


With Every Beat of My Heart

by Geonn



Category: Original Work
Genre: Blood, Blood Drinking, F/F, Historical References, Modern Era, Vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-29
Updated: 2014-02-03
Packaged: 2018-01-10 12:35:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 23,644
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1159804
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geonn/pseuds/Geonn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two women have a comfortable life together, there are just certain adjustments that have to be made.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Lindsey Wyatt had almost forgotten what the city looked like during the daytime hours. Pedestrians and traffic jams and sunlight glinting off the buildings, it seemed like a maddening mess. There were still people around at night when she drove to work, but they were few enough that they were easy to ignore. The buildings were dark and faded easily into her periphery so that she often felt like she was on a boat drifting along the seas. Occasionally someone else’s vessel would cross her path, but they had their own destinations and paid her little attention.

She worked at Channel 6 writing copy for the morning news and talk show. The show started at four-thirty and ended at seven, and she was usually back on the road by the time the sun was rising in the distance. On her drive home people were starting to come out of their caves, and Lindsey felt a strange urge to hide her face from them. 

The night shift had been difficult the first few months, with odd health problems and unbearable periods of complete wakefulness at the wrong hours. She would fall into a deep sleep half an hour before she had to leave for work, and Ellie would be forced to shake her out of bed and into the shower. But those were the early days before she had reset herself to be nocturnal. Now she loved the night. She woke without an alarm at nine, spent a few hours with Ellie before she went to work at midnight, and then she had the internet to keep her company until she was due to go in.

The internet was an amazing invention, and she was convinced it was designed solely with night owls in mind. Suddenly there was no clock on anything. She could watch the same TV shows, read the same articles, and read the same news as everyone else. Occasionally she got the news before anyone else. It may have been the middle of the night on the west coast, but it was morning in London and across Europe. It made her feel timeless.

She got back to the apartment she shared with Ellie in time to ride the elevator up when everyone else was waiting for it to go down. She smiled to the bleary-eyed people, the still half-asleep drones who were clutching coffees like they were a talisman granting them consciousness. She tried not to be too breezy or chirpy to them, but it was hard not to feel a little superior. The whole world was walking around with their eyes half-closed and out of focus, but she could see everything crystal clear.

At home she started cooking dinner, something nice and simple that didn’t require too much thought. She was just finishing when the front door opened.

“Hi, sweetie. How was your day?”

“Uneventful. Yours?”

“Full of news, all of it boring or celebrity-related.”

“Ugh. I’d rather have boring.”

Lindsey chuckled. “Me too.”

Ellie Girard was still wearing her patrol uniform, red hair done in a braid underneath a cap that she hung on the closet door. She paused with her back to the kitchen to take off her belt, and Lindsey took the chance to appreciate the curve of Ellie’s spine, the bell of her hips, still aroused at the sight of her in the uniform as she had been the very first time. She wet her lips with a quick pass of her tongue as Ellie joined her in the kitchen and embraced her from behind. She kissed Lindsey’s neck, and Lindsey had to fight to keep her knees locked.

“You smell good.”

“Oh, you’re biased.”

Ellie kissed her neck again and this time Lindsey let herself sag against the edge of the counter. Her eyes closed and she rested the heels of her hands on either side of the cutting board.

“Do you want some dinner?”

“Would you mind?”

“No... I was just,” she swallowed the lump in her throat, “I was just making something for myself. But if you’re hungry...”

“I am...”

Lindsey felt herself tremble. “Then you should eat.”

Ellie growled low in her throat. Lindsey braced herself and held her breath, and a moment later Ellie’s sharpened teeth sank into her skin. Lindsey squeaked quietly and curled her fingers, digging the nails into her palms as she arched her back. Ellie changed her position so that her hips were flush with the curve of Lindsey’s ass and she fastened her lips harder around the wound as she began to drink. Ellie’s hands roamed as she drank, moving across Lindsey’s stomach before splitting up. One slipped under her blouse and the other moved down to the waistband of her skirt. 

After that she opened her eyes and focused on the window, the light of the sun finally breaking through around the curtains. The light spread until it was all she could see, until it washed out the apartment, and she felt herself sagging backward. The last thing she felt was Ellie’s arms wrapping protectively around her, lifting her up as she slipped into unconsciousness.

#

Lindsey woke in their bed, her work clothes replaced with an oversized sweater. She was still wearing her socks, since her feet got irritatingly cold after their dinners, and she was grateful that Ellie had remembered. She reached up and touched her neck as she always did, though the wounds never failed to heal within minutes, and she pushed herself up on her elbows to see what time it was. Ellie came out of the bathroom in boxer shorts and a baggy tank top, her hair down around her shoulders in a pile of red waves. 

“Hey.”

“Hello. How do you feel?”

“A little woozy.”

Ellie crawled onto the bed and curled up at Lindsey’s side. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to take so much.”

Lindsey slid her hand over her lover’s smooth thigh. “It’s okay. I kind of like it when you knock me out. Not all the time, of course...”

“Of course.” Ellie bent down and kissed the inside of Lindsey’s elbow. Lindsey was aware of her pulse racing and pressed her arm up against Ellie’s mouth. The veins throbbed and Ellie slowly began to caress with her tongue, as if she could taste the warmth. Lindsey shivered, her arousal stoked once more as she watched Ellie suck her arm.

“Drink...”

“No, I took too much earlier.” 

Ellie didn’t exactly sound happy about the decision, but she did manage to stop licking the skin and moved up to Lindsey’s bicep. Lindsey rolled onto her side and cupped Ellie’s face, lifting her up until they could kiss. Ellie dipped her tongue into Lindsey’s mouth and pushed herself up to cover Lindsey’s body with her own. Lindsey hooked her leg on Ellie’s thigh and flipped them, pinning her stronger partner to the mattress before linking their fingers together. She grinned as she broke the kiss and began sliding down Ellie’s body, kissing her through the shirt.

“You drive me insane,” Ellie purred, her voice slipping into an accent from another life. Lindsey loved making her do that, loved displacing the woman from the twenty-first century and leaving her adrift in her years. She pushed up the shirt and kissed a line across Ellie’s stomach, pausing the tease the flame-shaped belly button with her tongue. Lindsey was an excellent multi-tasker and able to explore Ellie’s torso while her thumbs took care of the next barrier that stood in her way. They shifted and rearranged their legs so the shorts could come off, and Lindsey sat up to toss them away. Ellie scooted up so that the pillow was against the small of her back as she lifted one leg and curled it around Lindsey’s hip to draw her closer.

Lindsey smiled and counted another perk of working the night shift. One, the harsh overhead lights were off, but the sunlight filtering through the curtains let her see just enough to appreciate Ellie’s perfect body. The room was a soft shade of blue, perfect mood lighting for making love. Ellie plucked at the hem of Lindsey’s shirt and lifted it, sitting up to kiss between Lindsey’s breasts before pulling her down with her. Lindsey settled between Ellie’s legs and ran her tongue along Ellie’s now-blunt teeth. She bent her knee and arched her back as Ellie closed her thighs around her leg.

Another perk, her favorite perk, was that their neighbors were schoolteachers and bus drivers. It was half past noon and she was about to have sex with her partner, and neither of them had to worry about being quiet. 

As she rolled her hips, Ellie slipped a hand between them and cupped Lindsey’s mound with her palm. Lindsey sucked in a breath and held it until Ellie complied by easing one finger inside.

“More... more, another,” Lindsey demanded. 

Ellie cooed to her in Latvian, a language Lindsey would never have considered erotic in the slightest. But now it made her melt. In their time together she had learned a few choice phrases, just enough to understand what Ellie was promising her, and she whimpered with desire as she began to move faster. Ellie moved her free hand to Lindsey’s thigh and dug in hard. Not as hard as she could; they’d once had to explain a bruised femur when Ellie got a bit too aggressive. 

By now they had figured out a proper balance, and they could communicate wordlessly if something was amiss. If Ellie held on too tight, Lindsey only had to stroke two fingers along the thumb of the offending hand to alleviate the pressure. If Lindsey teased too much, Ellie could simply say “Stop” in a tone that left no question about her sincerity.

Lindsey broke their kiss and nudged Ellie’s head to the side, kissing along her cheek and down her neck to smell her scent. Most of the clichés weren’t true; Ellie could see herself in a mirror, she could eat garlic but she wasn’t a fan of the smell so she didn’t, and her skin was warm to the touch. And sometimes, like when they were intimate, she sweated. Lindsey breathed deeply as she surrendered to her climax, holding tight to Ellie, digging her fingers into the taut muscles of her lover’s arms as she came.

Afterward, still trembling, Lindsey pushed down Ellie’s body, pausing to kiss here and there before settling between her legs. Ellie gasped, “Quickly,” and Lindsey set aside any thought of teasing. She was a student of Ellie’s pleasure, spending long hours studying just how to prolong her orgasm or how to bring it about in seconds. It took a lot of experimentation, some trial and error, but she knew she had years to go before she mastered it. She smiled at her own train of thought and watched Ellie as she applied pressure to her clit with the tip of her tongue. Ellie arched her back, and just before she began to relax, Lindsey pressed the bent knuckle of her index finger against her labia.

Ellie cried out when she came, reaching up to slap her hand against the headboard. With no neighbors to overhear Lindsey just chuckled and kissed her lover’s thigh, pushed herself up, and stretched out over her body. She rested her head on Ellie’s chest and listened for the drub of her heartbeat. She had just fed, and fed well, so it sounded a little more human than usual. She had done that, her blood literally made Ellie’s heart beat faster. She smiled and closed her eyes before turning her head to kiss between Ellie’s breasts.

“I love you.”

“Katru dienu es tevi mīlu vairāk,” Ellie whispered as she stroked Lindsey’s hair. 

Lindsey kept her eyes closed. “I heard love in there somewhere...”

“Every day I love you more.”

Lindsey grinned. “Aw.” She wrapped her arms around Ellie’s waist and settled in. “Good night.”

“Good night, my love.”

Technically it would be good afternoon, but they didn’t care about semantics. Lindsey was drifting off when she felt her satin sleep mask being eased over her head and lovingly situated over her closed eyes. She cuddled against Ellie to show her gratitude, too tired for anything more intensive. As she drifted off she thought that she had been extremely fortunate to find a lover she could connect so well with, a soul that she understood so completely. Ellie was everything she had been looking for, even if she had to make some epic adjustments to her life. Switching to a nocturnal lifestyle, being very aware of her blood sugar and everything that went along with that, it was a small price to pay in exchange for being so in love that she was willing to pass out in order to give Ellie what she needed.

In the end, in their day-to-day lives, it hardly mattered at all that Ellie was a vampire.

#

Ellender Girard was born in Latvia just before the discovery of America. She didn’t know her exact age because things like keeping track of birth years wasn’t important. She was the third daughter of seven children, and she was in charge of taking care of the smaller animals on their farm. Her life was relatively uneventful until she was twelve or so, a budding young woman with suitors from other families starting to linger around their gate. Her sisters were quickly paired off, and at her eldest sister’s wedding she met Ilze. She enjoyed the older blonde girl’s company much more than the boys her parents wanted her to meet, and soon she started shirking her duties to sneak off with her new cousin.

One day they were swimming in the stream when Ellender fell and cut her hand open. She was too surprised to cry, and Ilze kissed the wound. Ellender watched, trembling and breathless, as her friend licked up the blood and then closed her mouth over the wound. Ellender felt a strange tingling in her skin as it was healed by whatever Ilze was doing. 

Afterward they lay side by side in the soft grass next to the riverbank. Ilze made Ellender promise to never tell what she had done, and Ellender had sworn her silence. Ilze kissed her lips then, and Ellender instantly knew that she would never be satisfied kissing any of the boys she would have to marry. 

She and Ilze remained friends throughout their childhood, remaining close through several courtships until Ilze accepted a proposal from a friend of her father. Ellender noticed that while her body was growing and changing, Ilze remained mostly the same. The night before Ilze’s wedding she finally asked, and Ilze took her aside.

“Do you remember the day by the river?”

“The day you kissed me.”

Ilze smiled. “The day I drank your blood.”

“Oh. Yes?”

“I’m not like you, Ellie. I drink water and eat food, but I don’t get the same sustenance from it as you do. I require something more. I need blood to survive. It slows my aging, and it makes me... different. Do you know why you only see me one day at a time? If I go out in sunlight too often, I become very sick. It eats at me and if I spend too much time outside, I will die.”

Ellender was confused. “But you always came to me during the day.”

Ilze stroked her hair. “It was worth the eventual pain to see you, if only for a moment.”

Ellender kissed her then. It was their second and final kiss, save for the one Ilze gave her on the neck. That one came days later, when Ilze returned from her honeymoon with red stains on her lips and black orbs in place of her eyes. The tapping at her window had woken Ellender, and she stifled a scream at the sight of the monster perched on her sill. Ilze was shaking with sickness, pale and desperate, moving her head from side to side as if trying to catch a scent. She had gone mad when she was alone with her husband, terrified of what he planned to do with her and fighting him off to the best of her ability. She pleaded with Ellender to understand, she had only meant to take enough to make him sleep, but once she started drinking she couldn’t stop herself.

“And now I need more, Ellie. I need more... I fear what I will do.”

So Ellender drew her trembling friend into her bedroom window, huddled with her under the covers, and then unbuttoned the high collar of her nightgown. Ilze recoiled in disgust, but Ellender grabbed her head and forced it down. Ilze’s lips trembled against her skin, then a light flutter of tongue, and Ellender felt something clench deep between her legs. She put a hand there and rubbed her mound, biting her bottom lip and closing her eyes in anticipation of the pain. She bled every month for no reason, so what harm was there in letting her blood alleviate her friend’s pain?

“Is there a better place for you to bite?” Ellender asked when Ilze held her open mouth over Ellender’s throat without touching. Ellender was still rubbing herself, enjoying how it felt to have her friend’s weight on top of her, breath hot on her throat. 

“If I take too much...”

“I would die here,” Ellender said. “I would be proud to.”

Ilze whimpered. “I remember how you taste, Ellie. No one has ever... tasted as good as you do.” The last word was spoken on a groan of desire, and then Ilze bit her.

Ellender’s eyes snapped open and she nearly choked holding back her cry of pain. But the pain was just the crest of the wave, and when the body of it crashed into her she realized there was a fair amount of pleasure in the mix. Her eyes rolled back in her head as her blood stained her nightgown and Ilze’s tongue lapped at her warm skin. Having finally surrendered to her hunger, Ilze shifted her weight so that she was on top of Ellender, perched on her hands and knees and thrusting her hips wantonly as she drank. In the midst of lightheadedness and pain, Ellender experienced her first orgasm. She came against her palm, felt the moisture on her fingertips combined with the warm flood drizzling down her chest.

And then she died.

#

Lindsey woke tangled in their sheets, sweeping her hand across the empty sheets before taking off her mask to confirm Ellie was gone. The living room light was on, so she kicked away the blankets, stretched her arms over her head, and checked the time on her phone. She sat on the edge of the bed as she poked at her social media notifications, then she stood up and pulled on a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt before going to find her girlfriend. 

Ellie was on the couch watching TV, showered and dressed in her lounging-around clothes. Her feet were bare and resting on the coffee table. Lindsey snapped her fingers.

“Just because I’m asleep doesn’t mean you can break the rules.”

“Sorry.” She dropped her feet to the floor. She picked up the remote and began hitting buttons. “I was just watching dumb movies until you woke up... is there anything recorded that you want to watch?”

Lindsey sat down and lifted Ellie’s feet, forcing her to twist and lay down with her head on the arm of the couch. “Give me the remote.”

“You’re grouchy today.”

“Just punchy, I guess. I have a headache.”

“Poor baby. Want a temple massage?”

Lindsey shook her head and rubbed Ellie’s thigh. “Thank you, though. How about this?” She highlighted a TV title. “Are you caught up on that?”

“Two episodes behind, I think.”

She scrolled down further. “Oh, we need to watch this before next week’s episode...”

“Okay.”

She chose the episode, but the remote down, and settled in. Ellie’s shift started at midnight, so they had over two hours to kill. As the episode started she thought about what they had in the kitchen for dinner. None of it appealed, so she patted Ellie’s hip.

“If we want to order in, we should do it now before the good places close.”

“You never ate that meal you were cooking earlier. I put it in the fridge.”

“Oh, right... thank you, baby.” Her hand resumed its gentle massage. “What about you?”

Ellie shook her head. “Not hungry.”

“Baby...”

“I’m fine. Promise.”

Lindsey sighed and shook her head. “If you keep pushing it, you’re going to get hungry and take too much from me again.”

Ellie sat up. “Are you blaming me for your headache?”

Lindsey closed her eyes. “No. I’m just grumpy. Ignore me.”

“Don’t do that.”

Lindsey looked at her. “Don’t...”

“Don’t use the Incident against me and then just shrug it off.” She turned and put her feet on the floor. “It’s not something to be thrown around lightly. Every time you mention it, I relive it, and I... I can’t go back to that night all the time.”

“Ellender... I’m sorry.” She reached out and first rubbed Ellie’s shoulder, then slipped the arm around her neck and pulled her close. “Come here. Hug me, damn it.” Ellie complied, burrowing her face against Lindsey’s neck. “I’m sorry.”

The Incident happened a year into their relationship. They had started a semi-regular drinking schedule, but Ellie had the power to veto a drink but also to add the occasional drink as needed. Lindsey hadn’t noticed that Ellie skipped five feedings in a row, and when she finally showed up at Lindsey’s apartment she was almost too weak to stand up. She almost begged for permission and, when it was granted, she pounced. 

She came back to herself a fraction of a second from too late. She was suddenly aware that Lindsey was lying on the floor under her in a pool of blood, unconscious, pale. Ellie, chin and hands covered in her girlfriend’s blood, had panicked and nearly called the precinct. Then she thought of calling her Sister, but she knew what her advice would be: finish the job and Turn her. Ellie had vowed she would never do that, but when the choice was defying Lindsey’s wishes and watching her die...

In the end, she called a doctor she knew and had him bring over bags full of Lindsey’s blood type. They did a quick and dirty transfusion, and Ellie stayed with her until the next morning when she finally started coming around.

“What happened...?”

“I am never drinking from you again.”

Lindsey had held her and, after a long quiet moment of comforting each other, Lindsey said, “You’ll drink from me when you need it. Understood, Ellender? Promise me.”

“I promise.”

Since then they had a strict policy. Lindsey could refuse to let Ellie drink, and Ellie could get blood from other willing sources even though there was an admittedly sexual component to the ritual. Ellie considered it cheating, Lindsey didn’t, but they found a way to compromise. And in the seven years of their relationship Ellie had only gone off the reservation four times. 

Now Ellie pulled back, touching her knuckles to the corners of each eye and blinking back the moisture. “I swear to you, Lindsey, I am not hungry. I don’t need anything after last night.”

“Okay. I’ll take your word for it.”

“You’d better.”

Lindsey growled and curled her lip. “You’re not the only one who can bite, Officer. I just do it for recreation.” She snapped her teeth and Ellie put her hand over Lindsey’s face to push her back. Lindsay slipped out from under her feet. “Do you want something to drink?”

“I’ll take a glass of wine.”

“Really? Right before work?”

“Really? Vampire metabolism?”

Lindsey waved her off and went into the kitchen. Seven years and she still sometimes thought of Ellie in terms of humanity. Ellie was stronger, faster, and had keener senses than any normal person, but it was easy to forget because she didn’t flaunt them. The only special ability she used on a regular basis was to let Lindsey know when the people downstairs were having sex. That was only because Lindsey thought the girl was hot, and the idea of her getting laid was a turn-on.

After she had her wine and Lindsey had her dinner, Ellie went to change back into her uniform. She could have changed at work, but she preferred to show up ready to go. There was also the fact that Lindsey found the uniform to be a huge turn-on, so Ellie liked wearing it at home. More than a few times Ellie’s official-issue handcuffs had been replaced with a pair that were fur-lined. She put her hair up and tucked the errant strands under the edge of the cap, tugged the brim down so that it shielded her eyes, and she went back out into the living room.

“Protect and serve, beautiful,” Lindsey said from her position on the couch.

“I’ll do my best.” She bent over the back of the couch and kissed the top of Lindsey’s head. “I love you, Gadget.”

“I love you, too. Be safe.”

She stroked Lindsey’s hair once more before she straightened up and finally left the apartment. She wore a bulletproof vest under her blouse even though she could withstand bullet wounds because it was easier than going without and explaining why. She had been a police officer once before, in Boston around the time of World War I. It was an easy enough job with her special skills, and she felt wearing a badge once per century was a good way of paying back for all the horrible things she had done in the past. She stepped out of the apartment building and looked up into the sky, taking a few seconds to watch as the colors faded from the sky.

She adjusted her collar and went to work.


	2. Chapter 2

Ellender Girard awoke in dirt, coughing up a mouthful of her shallow grave as she fought to get free of its weight. Her terror abated as she remembered what had led to this moment, and she grabbed her neck to feel the wound. She was surprised to find herself intact, and turned to see Ilze sitting against the trunk of a nearby tree. Her legs were bent so that her knees were up near her shoulders, her arms hanging down between them like some sort of mantis. Her hair was limp and unwashed, and she was staring at Ellender with dark eyes.

“I’m sorry.”

Ellender shivered in the cold; she was only wearing a nightgown. Finally she found her voice. “I’m not.”

The carcass of an animal was lying nearby, its neck broken so it wouldn’t have lost any blood in its death. Ellender crawled from the grave and crawled to it on her hands and knees. She looked at Ilze who gave a quick nod, and Ellender began to feed. It tasted disgusting, and more than once she pulled back and gagged, nauseated at what she was doing. But the Thing inside of her demanded more, and she would eventually turn back and take another drink.

Ilze led her to a cave where they rested through the sunlight hours, and the next night they found clothes hanging on a laundry line. Ellender dressed and took Ilze’s hand before the two women set off into the darkness. The speed with which they moved seemed so natural that Ellender hardly noticed, only paying attention when they arrived at the next town in a matter of minutes. In her experience it should have taken them until morning without horses. They found an inn and knocked until they woke the owner, spinning a story of abuse and desperation that resulted in the eventual offer of a free room.

They thanked him profusely and, through idle conversation, Ilze determined how many other people were staying at the inn. An hour before dawn, she and Ilze left their beds and crept into the neighboring room. There they found a slumbering man and his wife, and Ilze indicated without words that Ellender could have the woman. She hesitated, but she was still so hungry even after her meal after waking. She nodded and, to her future shame, wet her lips.

They pounced on the bed simultaneously, like two paws of a predatory cat, silencing their prey with hands clapped over widening mouths. Ilze bowed her body over her food, but Ellender spread her body across her victim like they were lovers. She whispered that she was sorry before she sank her new teeth into the tender and warm skin. When the first taste sprayed across her tongue she knew she was addicted, knew that dead and cold blood would never sate her the same way. She drank the woman dry, rising up with a blood-slickened face to watch as Ilze dropped her victim back onto the mattress. 

Both women were panting as they left the room and returned to their own beds. Ellender crawled under Ilze’s blanket and held her.

“Will it always be like that?”

“Perhaps not always. But often.”

Ellender shuddered and held her tighter. “I want more.”

Ilze laughed and stroked Ellender’s back. “You will have all you can drink. All in good time, my dear Ellie. And time is something we have in abundance...”

Three hundred years passed, and Ellender Girard was still haunted by the fact she had never learned the name of her first victim. The woman’s ghost, wide-eyed and confused as she met her doom, haunted her through the centuries in search of an identity. The woman was the first blemish on Ellender’s ledger, but she was far from the last.

#

“What’s her name again?”

“I’ve told you her name eighty times, El.”

“I know, but I just...”

“Jessica. What is so hard about Jessica?”

Ellie sighed. “It’s too normal. I keep overthinking it. Julie, Julia, June.” She finished setting the table and rubbed her hands on her jeans. She was wearing a gray V-neck T-shirt and a thick brown belt. It was eight in the morning, usually their bedtime and the time everyone else in town was getting ready for work. Due to their late schedules, it was the time that felt the most appropriate to have a small dinner party. Ellie had liked the idea in principle, but now she was starting to question everything. She looked at herself and then tugged at her shirt. “I should change.”

“You look fine.”

“Just fine?”

Lindsey came out of the kitchen and hugged her from behind. “If you looked any better I would spend the entire dinner worried about Debra and Jessica being so jealous of what I have that they would conspire to get me fired.”

“Well, I’d hate to be the cause of that.”

Lindsey nuzzled her neck. “Just relax, okay? You’re comfortable around me, and Deb is just like me. Same job, went to the same school. She’s not the President or a celebrity.”

“Jessica, on the other hand...”

“She does the morning news. Besides, she doesn’t count as a celebrity if you can’t even remember her name.”

Ellie sighed and then tensed as the downstairs buzzer sounded. “Shit. I’m not ready.”

Lindsey lightly swatted her rear end and went to let them in. “It’s dinner. Just relax, okay?” She hit the buzzer. “Come on up.” She walked back to Ellie and took her hands. “It’ll be fine. They’ll love you. They’ll think you’re charming and funny and goofy just like I do.”

“You just think I’m sexy.”

“They’ll think that, too.” She kissed the corners of Ellie’s mouth. “Just relax. If push comes to shove, I’ll let you eat one of them as dessert.” 

“Promises, promises,” Ellie said.

The ladies arrived and introductions were made - “At long last, the infamous Officer El!” and “If half the work stories Lindsey tells me are true, I’m going to have to keep an eye on you tonight!” - before they sat down to eat. For all the worry, the evening turned out to be a huge success. Jessica was as anxious as Ellie, maybe more, and their fretting seemed to cancel each other out. Deb suggested a nickname for their little group: the Hoppers. “After Edward Hopper. Nighthawks?”

“I like it.” Ellie lifted her glass. “To the Hoppers.”

“Cheers.” 

They all touched glasses, and then Lindsey adjourned to the kitchen to cut some cake for dessert. Ellie joined her and grinned once they were alone. 

“Three little words, Ellender.”

“Actually four: You were right, Lindsey.”

Lindsey preened as Deb came into the kitchen to see if she could help. Lindsey said she could cut the slices of cake to the size she wanted, and Deb took a knife from the rack. She examined the cake before she chose her angle. She lowered the knife and then hissed. Ellie and Lindsey both turned to see what had happened, watching as a thin bead of red appeared on the pad of Deb’s thumb.

“Shoot,” Deb muttered.

Ellie grabbed a paper towel, folded it into quarters, and took Deb’s hand. She applied pressure and said, “Linds, do we have any Band-Aids?”

Lindsey was standing very still on Deb’s other side. “Yeah. There’s a pack in the bathroom in the medicine cabinet. Why don’t you go get one?”

Ellie met Lindsey’s eye. “I’m a little busy here...”

“I can take over.”

“I...” Ellie thought better about arguing and let Lindsey take Deb’s hand. “Okay. I’ll be right back.” She left the kitchen and found Jessica in the dining room looking abandoned. She perked up, but her smile wavered when she saw Ellie’s expression. “Everything’s fine. Deb just got a little nick on her thumb. I’m going to get a Band-Aid.”

She went into the bathroom, retrieved the box, and came into the kitchen to find Jessica and Lindsey doting on a very embarrassed Deb. She sheepishly took the Band-Aid and waved off her well-meaning friends. “It’s just a little cut! You don’t have to call the emergency room. I’m such a klutz that I keep the bandages in the kitchen at my place just to save time. Thank you, Ellie.”

“No problem.”

Deb said, “Are you all going to let me put this on myself, or are you going to make me lie down on the table so you can play doctor?”

“Maybe we’ll do that later,” Jessica whispered, low enough that only Ellie and Deb heard it. 

They finished dessert without further incident, then parted ways. Ellie changed for bed while Lindsey showered and she was sitting up against the headboard with a book in her lap when Lindsey came out of the bathroom in her pajamas.

“What was that? In the kitchen?”

“What was what?”

“You didn’t want to leave me alone with Deb.”

Lindsey squirted some lotion into her palm and applied it to her arms. “I thought you could get to the bathroom and back faster, and I thought maybe with how strong you are, you might have been putting too much pressure on the wound. That’s all.”

“You thought I was going to go crazy and drink her blood.”

“No...”

Ellie said, “Admit it. You saw blood, and you thought I wouldn’t be able to handle it.”

Lindsey started to deny, then sighed and shrugged. She shook her head rather than answering. “It’s not that I expected the worst from you. It’s that I would have understood if, in that situation, you would have found it a little difficult to restrain yourself.”

“I’ve had three hundred years to get used to the sight of blood. You notice I don’t fly off the handle at the end of every month.”

Lindsey sighed. “I know... but it was unexpected blood, right there in the kitchen. I guess I just thought... I don’t know.”

Ellie reached over and rubbed her arm. “It’s sweet that you were worried, but you don’t have to. I can control myself.” She moved her hand to the back of Lindsey’s neck and pulled her close. She kissed her and nibbled her bottom lip before letting go. “See? I can stop before biting.”

“Show-off.”

Ellie winked. “Let’s get some sleep.”

Lindsey kissed Ellie’s cheek. “Okay. Thank you for not being mad.”

“Your heart was in the right place. Good night.”

“Night.”

They settled in and Lindsey reached over to turn off the light. She plumped up her pillow, curled on her side, and smiled as Lindsey curled up against her from behind. Ellie reached back and smoothed her hand over her partner’s hip to urge her closer. Lindsey snuggled up tight and hummed quietly as she slipped her hand across Ellie’s stomach. Ellie tucked her hand under the blanket and looked at the line of sunlight peeking around the curtains, wondering how she had found herself in this apartment, in these arms, with this life.

#

She was day-walking, something she did much more often before Lindsey made her comfortable with a purely nocturnal lifestyle. She wore her hair down to protect her neck and ears, big sunglasses, and baseball caps with long brims that could cover her entire face in shadow if necessary. Four hours in the sun was fine, eight hours was running unnecessary risks, and anything between eight and twelve was certain to result in a rash. The disguise helped, but it also got people whispering and trying to see if she was a celebrity avoiding cameras.

On the day in question, the day she would always consider the turning point of her current lifetime, she had been caught out much longer than she expected. There were certain things that could only be done during business hours in those days, and she had to stop at the bank, the DMV, and she had to qualify at the gun range. It was infuriating to be tested in aptitude for a weapon she had been using since the damn things were invented, and she was not in the best headspace.

When she joined the line for a simple cup of coffee, she hadn’t realized how long she’d been out until she started to idly scratch at the inside of her wrist. She finally pushed down her sleeve and saw the spreading red-pink splotch, the goosebumps inside its irregular edges looking almost like tiny boils. She tugged the sleeve back into place and turned on her heel, tugging her hat down as she ran for the door. She pushed it open without thinking of the people on the sidewalk, barreling forward with only thoughts of getting home to safety rolling around in her head.

She collided with Lindsey immediately, an immovable object slamming into an unstoppable force. They chest-bumped like drunken frat boys, both reaching out to prevent the other from falling. Lindsey’s hands hooked on Ellie’s elbows, and Ellie grabbed the front of Lindsey’s coat and pulled her forward to cancel out her backward trajectory. Their legs tangled and Ellie’s feet came off the ground just long enough that their combined momentum caused Lindsey to twist and toss Ellie flat onto her back on the sidewalk.

The whole dance lasted less than a second, but Ellie saw every moment with perfect clarity. She saw Lindsey’s eyes go wide behind her glasses, the smattering of pale pink freckles across the bridge of her nose, and the blonde-orange hair that cradled her face as she struggled to remain upright while holding up the truck that had just slammed into her.

Ellie lay on her back and exhaled sharply, blinking in surprise as Lindsey hit her knees and put a hand on her shoulder.

“Oh, my God. Please tell me you’re all right. God, that had to have broken something. Are you okay?” She straightened up to look at the crowd that had gathered around them. “Does anyone have a phone? We need to call 911...”

Ellie grabbed her hand. “No. It’s okay...”

“It’s not okay! You hit pavement and bounced. You need to get checked out, at least.”

“I’m fine.” She grunted as she got up, more because it was expected than because she felt it necessary. She kept her hand on Lindsey’s. “I wasn’t watching where I was going. It was entirely my fault. And I’m fine. I just got the wind knocked out of me, that’s all.”

“Are you sure?”

Ellie smiled and patted her arm. “You’re very sweet to worry.”

“Well, I don’t often knock women off their feet. I’d hate to think I injured one when I finally managed it.”

Ellie smiled. “Will you help me up?”

“Oh. Of course.” She stood and offered her hands, hauling Ellie up onto her feet. “You looked like you were heading somewhere in a hurry. Can I give you a ride?”

“I don’t think so. But thank you.”

“Okay. Well...” She noticed she was still holding Ellie’s arm and self-consciously withdrew. “Um. Can I get your number?”

“Why?”

Lindsey smiled and blushed, and her freckles changed color as she looked anywhere else but Ellie’s face.

“Oh. Oh!” She furrowed her brow. “I don’t see what the harm would be.”

They exchanged numbers and parted ways. Ellie made it home before the rash spread very far. She wrapped herself in a cloak and called in sick to work. Barbara promised to cover for her, and she burrowed into her bed until the damage faded. When she was feeling well again, she discovered the slip of paper with Lindsey’s number on it. She held it over the trash can for almost a full minute, then carried it to the phone and dialed.

“Lindsey Wyatt’s desk.”

“Hi. Uh, this is... Ellie.”

A long pause on the other end. “How can I help you, Ellie?”

“I... we-we met the other day. Well, we didn’t meet. I ran into you, and we, I ended up on the sidewalk and...”

“Oh! Ellie! Sorry, we never actually exchanged names, did we? Hi! God, I’m glad you called.”

“You are?”

“Well, to be honest, I kind of gave up on you last night. I was feeling kind of bummed about it, too. How often do you get to literally sweep a woman off her feet?”

Ellie smiled. “You said that before.”

“Oh. We’ve known each other five minutes and I’m already repeating myself. That doesn’t bode well, does it?”

“I don’t know. I think it’s a cute joke.” She leaned against the wall. “Would you like to have dinner with me sometime?”

There was a burst of air against the receiver. “Um. Yes. Yes, definitely. It’s the least I can do after laying you out like that.”

“It really didn’t hurt that bad.”

“Good. I’m glad. I’m, uh... free on Thursday and Friday.”

Ellie looked at the spot on her wrist where the rash had only recently faded. “I will be free, but it might be kind of late. Say Friday at eight-thirty?”

“That sounds fine to me. I’ll see you then.”

“Okay. I’ll call you when I know where we’re going. Any preferences?”

Lindsey said, “I’m fine with pretty much anything. As long as it’s not some sort of specialty place, I’ll find something to enjoy.”

“Good. Then I will see you on Friday.”

“I’ll see you then.” She chuckled. “I was wondering how I would ask you out. Thanks for taking the pressure off. Friday.”

Ellie hung up and stared at the receiver. After a moment she snorted softly, shook her head, and dropped her hand to her side. She didn’t know what had possessed her to act so foolishly, but whatever the impetus, the result was the same. She had a date with a cute, funny, awkward woman. The details were secondary and, in the long run, unimportant.

#

Red and blue lights danced across the closed storefronts, catching Ellie in their strobes as she ran from her squad car. The call for backup had come through three minutes earlier, and she sent her partner to watch the front of the building while she went around the back. Officers Kasper and Sermons had reported a whole gang of people inside the department store and required help rounding them all up. She saw their flashlights through the broken glass at the front of the store, and their voices were raised but calm. Her partner announced their arrival as he went inside and Ellie followed the sidewalk to the alley.

It had been four days since she had a drink, and her hunger made her senses sharper. She could see shapes moving through the darkness, heard their rushed breath and beating hearts as they tried to hide from her in the darkness. She moved into the mouth of the alley and aimed her light at their hiding place.

“All right, come on out of there.”

There was a scuffle, then the two suspects burst out from cover. The one in back shoved his friend forward, sending him sprawling as a distraction. The kid shouted and fell, and Ellie sidestepped him to take off after his friend. She reached up and pressed down the button on her radio. “I have a runner! West side alley, heading north.” The kid scrambled over a fence Ellie could have easily scaled, but she thought there was a way to end things faster. She paused under a fire escape, crouched, and jumped straight up as if her shoes were spring-loaded. She gripped the ladder with one hand, pulled herself up, then leapt from the side of one landing to the next until she was at the roof. Free from further hurdles, she ran along the edge of the rooftop with her quarry visible below her. He sidestepped dumpsters, hauled himself up over fences and obstacles, still looking behind him to see if she was still there.

As soon as he thought he was clear he stopped running, and Ellie chose that moment to descend. She jumped from the roof and landed with cat-like stealth behind him. He slowed to a trot, laughing at his escape just before she grabbed the collar of his jacket and spun him toward the wall. He yelped in surprise as she pulled his arms back to cuff him.

“What the hell? Where’d you come from?”

She smiled and ratcheted the cuffs shut. “You wouldn’t believe what they’re training us to do at the academy these days. Come on.” She hauled him out of the alley and took the long way around back to the department store. Her partner and the other officers had gathered the rest of his group, and she added her catch to the row of would-be thieves sitting on the curb. Her partner, Ashley Bell, made her way over and nudged her arm.

“You all right, track star?”

“I’m fine.”

“I saw you take off. Didn’t even think of keeping up with you. Good catch.”

Ellie nodded. “Pretty good night.”

“I’d say so. At least until we have to do the paperwork.”

Ellie grinned and followed Ashley over to where the other officers had gathered. She had enough years under her belt to try for detective, but she wasn’t interested. She could do much more good on foot, patrolling the streets, than she ever could killing time behind a desk. Sadly she knew that in a few years she would have to find a way to transition from the job so no one got suspicious of the eternally-youthful officer. She had cut it close in the past so she had an idea of how long she could go. She figured she had two more years before she had to start enacting her escape plan.

Across the street from the crime scene, a small crowd had gathered. They were drawn from the all-night diner by the flashing lights and the sirens, and now they were getting a vicarious thrill from watching everything going down. The bad guys were in custody, the cops were standing down, and the situation was safe enough for them to rubberneck. Ellie looked over at them and felt the hairs on the back of her neck stand up.

“Ashley, could you...” Her voice trailed off, but she trusted her partner to fill in the blanks. She trotted across the street even though the smiler in the crowd had already vanished. Ellie ducked under the crime scene tape one of the other officers had strung up, and then she started to run. She had barely made it a block before she saw a slip of black disappear around a corner. She caught up, reaching out to grab the woman’s shoulder. 

The woman turned, threw herself into Ellie’s arms, and slammed her against the wall. They were kissing before Ellie knew what was happening, a violent clash, teeth and tongues and fingernails turned into tearing claws. Ellie’s mind fogged over with memory and desire until she remembered herself and shoved the woman away. 

“No, Ilze!”

“Playing hard to get? We can do rough...”

Ellie put a hand in the center of Ilze’s chest to hold her back. “I’m with someone.”

“I know.” She licked the corner of her mouth. “I tasted human on you. Nice to have you back in the fold.”

“I’m not back in anything.” She realized she was slipping back into her old accent, and she hated herself for it. “What are you doing here? We had a treaty.”

“We did. You get this musty, damp city, and I get New Orleans, and we don’t cross paths for eighty years. I arrived this morning and couldn’t resist the chance to see you in action. And I wanted to see if you could feel my presence.” She grinned. “The time is up, princess.”

Ellie tensed. “It can’t be.”

“We made the covenant in 1934. Surely you can do the math. Hell, you taught me how to do math. We’ve had our fun, traveled a bit... the wars were...” Her thoughts drifted and she narrowed her eyes dreamily. “Mm. But ours is a life of change. You remember the constraints of the agreement?”

Ellie growled, baring her teeth. “I do.”

“Good.” Ilze stepped forward and stroked her cheek. “I’ve missed you, darling. We’re going to have so much fun together.”

Ellie pulled away from the touch, causing Ilze’s expression to darken. “You were the one who arranged the terms. I gave you eighty years, and now your time is up. You are mine again, Ellender.”

“I have a life here. I can’t simply walk away. I need time.”

“Eight decades...”

“I have a life,” Ellie repeated softly. “Give me a week.”

Ilze inhaled deeply and let it out. She looked out at the street and finally nodded. “A week. I suppose it’s reasonable enough. But after that...”

“I will go with you.”

Ilze reached into her pocket and withdrew a card. “This is where I’m staying. And I’m going by Lisa Jannson these days.”

Ellie took the card and folded it before placing it in her pocket. “Fine. Now get out of here. I have a job to do.”

“For another week. Use it well.” She touched her lips and smiled. “And say hello to your sweet little canteen for me, whoever she is. She’s making you glow.”

Ellie watched as her sire walked away, fuming but unable to do anything. The card felt like a spark in her pocket, burning through the material to scorch her flesh.


	3. Chapter 3

Their first date ended on the couch, when kissing and touching led to kissing and stroking on a horizontal plane. Lindsey was the aggressor in the progression from playing around to something more, a position she rarely found herself in. She enjoyed taking control and she appreciated Ellie letting her. She got a feeling it wasn’t something she was used to, either. She broke the kiss and moved her lips lower, briefly touching on her throat before skimming down to her T-shirt. She kissed Ellie’s breasts through the cotton as she experimentally pushed up her shirt to reveal her belly. 

“Wait,” Ellie said, dropping her hand to touch the side of Lindsey’s head.

Lindsey groaned and turned to kiss her palm. “If you make me stop, I’ll have to run in my bedroom real quick and shut the door.”

Ellie exhaled sharply. “You have toys in there?”

“Yes.”

“Oh,” Ellie murmured, watching through half-closed eyes as Lindsey licked the lines of her palm. She shivered. “There is something I have to tell you. I’m... afflicted with a condition.”

Lindsey looked up. “Oh. Is it serious?”

“Extremely. But it is not contagious. Not... accidentally contagious.” She wet her lips. “I’m a vampire.”

Lindsey relaxed slightly and stretched back up her body. “Oh, I get it. Sexy countess... I am the great Van Helsing, and I will make you pay for terrorizing the village...”

“No,” Ellie said softly. “Not role play. This is real. I’m a vampire.”

Lindsey frowned. “That’s just some internet rumor...”

Ellie shook her head. “I am over three centuries old. I was bitten in Latvia in the seventeenth century, though I’m not exactly certain of the date. For the past hundred years or so I’ve lived in America.”

Lindsey watched her carefully for signs she was playing a trick or just really involved with the role play, but she quickly came to the conclusion she was telling the truth.

“You really... bite people and suck their blood?”

“Not for decades. Blood banks, animals, I find ways to sate my thirst without hurting anybody.” She let her eyes drop to Lindsey’s lips before she looked away. “I thought you should know before this went further. I owed you the truth before you made the decision to--”

Lindsey shushed her, then bent down and kissed her lips again. Her hands began moving again, and Ellie lifted her arms over her head to grip the chair as Lindsey sank down again. She dropped one foot to the floor, pressed her other knee against the back of the couch, and Lindsey pushed her skirt up and her underwear out of the way.

Afterward, lying together on the floor between the couch and the coffee table, Ellie kissed the top of Lindsey’s head. The music Lindsey had put on before dinner was still playing softly, and she rested her hand on Ellie’s chest to draw shapes through the sweat on her skin. They had both fallen quiet, neither of them eager to break the tranquility.

Finally Ellie couldn’t stand not knowing the answer. “You took that very well.”

Lindsey looked up at her. “I knew there was something off about you. I didn’t know what it was, and there was no way I would have guessed, but when you said that... it made sense. And if that’s the worst secret you’re hiding, I think I can deal with it.”

“Oh...”

Lindsey furrowed her brow. “There’s a worse secret?”

“Well. I don’t know where you would put it on a scale...”

Lindsey propped herself up on her elbow and looked down at her. “I can take it.”

“I tend to snore.”

“Oh, shit.” Lindsey shuddered with revulsion. “No. Sorry. That’s... uh-uh...”

Ellie grabbed her arm. “Please. I can try to change.”

“Well...” Lindsey slid her leg across Ellie’s waist and settled on top of her. “I suppose I could always just come up with ways to keep you awake all night.”

Ellie grinned and pulled Lindsey down for a kiss.

Six months later they were having dinner in Lindsey’s apartment when Ellie tried to surreptitiously pop a pill into her mouth before she started eating. 

“What is that?”

“Nothing. Just a supplement.”

“I thought vampires had fantastic metabolisms. You don’t really need to eat, you only need to drink sparingly... what do you need a supplement for?”

Ellie hesitated, obviously looking for a way to simply not answer. “It’s iron supplements.”

“Iron... like blood.”

“Yes. I’m slightly anemic. It’s fine. I take my pills and it’s under control.”

Lindsey wiped her lips on her napkin, stood up, and rounded the table. She put her leg across Ellie’s lap and sat down facing her. Ellie leaned back and smiled, her hands resting lightly on the curve of Lindsey’s hips.

“What’s going on?”

“Bite me.”

Ellie stiffened and her smile vanished. “Get off of me.”

Lindsey put her hands on Ellie’s shoulders and held her in place. “You need it. You’re taking pills to make up for the deficiency. I’ve done some reading on blood donations, and people do it all the time. There are people who do it on a regular basis. If I’m careful, and if you’re careful, you can drink from me without harm.”

“Without harm,” Ellie repeated under her breath. “I struggled to overcome my addiction, Lindsey. You don’t know what it’s like to have one source of sustenance and to deny yourself taking it because it harms another.”

“Ellender, I don’t want you to deny yourself. I can give you what you need and I’m doing it willingly. You’re not harming anyone.”

“It hurts. I pierce your flesh and draw blood, it will _hurt_ you.”

“I don’t care.”

“I do.”

Lindsey cupped her face. “I love you.”

Ellie flinched. “Don’t say that...”

“I love you, Ellender. I’m sorry if it’s awkward for you, but I do. And I see you struggle with drop-offs from the bank, and I see the face you make when you drink it. I know that you’ve spent decades just getting by because you didn’t trust anyone enough to ask them. Or maybe you didn’t trust yourself enough to be asked. But you need blood and it’s right here.” She lifted Ellie’s hand to her throat and forced her to touch the vein. Ellie swallowed a lump in her throat and looked at Lindsey with tear-filled eyes. “Please.”

Ellie leaned in and kissed Lindsey’s lips. A few seconds later she slid to her jaw, then to her neck. Lindsey tensed and threaded her arms under Ellie’s. She gripped the back of the chair and slid forward. Ellie’s lips were trembling against her neck, and she felt a quick brush of her tongue to prepare the area. She shuddered and kissed Ellie’s hair. Ellie kissed up to her earlobe.

“I love you, too. Damn it, I tried not to...”

“Sh. Take what you need.”

Ellie returned her lips to Lindsey’s neck and parted her lips. There was a nick, and Lindsey tensed. A moment later she felt a pressure, like a pinch combined with the feel of an injection. She felt blood beginning to well up around the puncture points and tightened her thighs, holding her breath as Ellie began to drink. Lindsey curled her hands up and stroked Ellie’s back, her fingers tightening as Ellie pursed her lips and sucked.

She thought she had braced herself for the sensation. She’d been thinking about it for a month, reading the online blogs of vampire fetishists to find out what to expect when she finally broached the subject. She had even gone to donate blood so she could react to the gross feeling of being stuck without worrying about how Ellie would take it. But nothing could prepare her for having the woman she loved using her as literal sustenance. 

She supposed there were pheromones involved, some sort of vampiric enzyme that lulled their victims into surrendering to the drink. But Lindsey knew it had to go deeper than that. She began moving her hips, thrusting gently against Ellie’s lap as her blood flowed onto Ellie’s tongue. She listened to Ellie’s rough breathing and felt it on the back of her neck. Ellie moved her hands up under Lindsey’s shirt and clawed her back. It wasn’t hard enough to leave marks, but it caused shivers to run up and down her spine as she sagged forward.

Lindsey felt a wave of lightheadedness. “Stop.”

Ellie growled.

“Stop, Ellender.”

Ellie turned her head away, then leaned back. Lindsey leaned back as well. Ellie’s lips were bright red, like she had just painted herself up for a photo shoot. Her eyes were completely black and shining, and two sharp fangs extended over her lower teeth. She blinked and her whites returned. She closed her lips, swallowed a few times, and her fangs appeared blunter when she opened her mouth to take another breath. There was sweat on her forehead and upper lip.

“I think I came,” Lindsey said, surprised at how breathless she sounded.

Ellie smiled sheepishly and ducked her head to lick her lips. “That can happen. I should have warned you.” 

“I’m glad you didn’t. It was a nice surprise.”

Lindsey leaned in but Ellie pulled back. “Let me wash out my mouth first.”

“It’s my blood. And I don’t care.” She kissed Ellie and, after a moment, Ellie kissed her back. “I’m sorry for your sobriety. But I plan on being here for a long time. Drink when you need it, just be sure to give me time to... you know... prepare.”

“I will. And speaking of preparation, you should eat something.”

“Right.” She stood up, but Ellie grabbed her hand before she could go back to her side of the table. “I do love you.”

“I love you, too. I’ve never quite demonstrated it like that before, but...” She brought Ellie’s hand to her lips and kissed the knuckles. “Mm. Yes. Definitely need some food.”

“And water.”

“You’re going to be a tyrant about this, aren’t you?”

“You’re damn right.”

Lindsey smiled. “How do you feel?”

Ellie took a deep breath and exhaled. “Better than I have in ages. Thank you, Lindsey.”

“You’re very welcome.” She sat down and picked up her silverware. “Now, finish your meal and I’ll show you something you can do to me with _your_ mouth that feels just as good.”

Ellie grinned, took a drink of water to cleanse her mouth, and started eating.

#

Lindsey came home from work to find Ellie was already there, sitting on the couch staring at the blank TV screen. All the lights save the one in the kitchen were off, and the apartment was freezing. “Hey. I thought you were working until eight.” She changed direction to pass by the couch and dropped a kiss on Ellie’s head. “Did something happen?”

“No. I just needed some time to think about some things.”

“Oh. Everything okay?” When Ellie didn’t reply, Lindsey paused. “El? Honey, what’s wrong?”

Ellie softly said, “I can’t do this anymore.”

“Do what?”

“This. Us.” She stood up and smoothed her hands down the front of her blouse. She turned and Lindsey saw she had been crying. “I can’t do this.”

Lindsey froze in the kitchen doorway. “What are you talking about?”

“I think we should stop seeing each other.”

“Baby, what happened at work? Let’s sit down and talk...”

“Nothing happened at work. We both knew when this started it would be a finite arrangement.”

Lindsey said, “Yeah, years down the road...”

“It’s years down the road now,” Ellie said. “We’ve been together seven years.”

“And I want to be together for another seventy! Or, you know, however long I have. Remember what you said to me on our first anniversary?”

Ellie was breathing hard, looking at the floor. “I didn’t mean it.”

“Bullshit.”

“Lindsey. Please. I’ve been... playing human for so long that I’ve started to forget who I am. What I am. I’m not like you, and pretending isn’t doing anybody any good.”

Lindsey shook her head. “I need a drink... can we just time-out? I don’t understand anything you’re saying.”

“It’s very simple. I’m breaking up with you.”

“The hell you are.”

“Lindsey...”

“I don’t expect you to spend your life with me. I told you at the beginning I knew it wasn’t possible. But I’ll be damned if I let you throw away something this good. Have you ever loved anyone the way you love me? Have you ever been loved as strongly as I love you?” Ellie rubbed her face. “Answer the question. Even if the answer is yes, I want to know.”

“No,” Ellie said. “You know I haven’t.”

“Then what the hell--”

“You’re getting old.”

Ellie’s voice was sharp, a verbal slap across the face that took Lindsey back a step. She let the words sink in and lowered her own voice in response.

“What did you just say?”

“I’m staying the same age, and you’re getting old. We looked similar in age when we met, but now you look too old for me.”

Lindsey worked her jaw, flexing her fingers at her sides. “Get out.” Ellie glanced toward the window, still dark though the sun was due to rise within the hour. Lindsey caught the glance and shook her head. “I don’t care. You can find a damn hotel or go sleep at your partner’s apartment, but I don’t want you here. Calm down or get past whatever the hell bit you this morning, and then come back and apologize.”

“If I leave, I won’t come back,” Ellie said.

Lindsey’s eyes were burning. “Why do you get to decide when it’s over?”

“Because I do.”

“I don’t accept that.”

Ellie shook her head. “I’m sorry, Linds.” She walked toward the door. “I’ll come back for my things.”

Lindsey moved to intercept her. “Wait.” She rolled up her sleeve and held her arm out. Ellie stared at it, then frowned at her. Lindsey sniffled, letting her teas fall freely. “You haven’t fed in a couple of days. If you... get hungry, or if you get caught out in the sun, you should top off.”

Ellie stared at the exposed arm, almost wetting her lips when she looked at the crook of her elbow. She gently took hold of Lindsey’s wrist and returned it to her side.

“Goodbye, Lindsey.”

“I won’t say it back.”

Ellie looked at her. “I love you.”

“Liar.”

Ellie flinched at that. “If I could...”

“Just get out.”

Ellie ducked her head and walked out of the apartment. Lindsey stared at the door, unsure of what had just happened. Seven years had been destroyed in less than seven minutes. She was trembling. Angry, sad, confused, frightened. It was completely senseless. They had talked about Lindsey’s relatively brief lifespan, the fact that Ellie would likely live centuries after Lindsey was dead, but she thought they had come to an understanding about that.

They had been lying in bed, Lindsey freshly fucked and Ellie freshly fed, when they started talking about the future. 

“I must seem kind of trifling to you.”

“There’s nothing trifling about you, dear,” Ellie said, kissing the curve of Lindsey’s shoulder.

“No, I mean...” She sat up. “You’ve been around at least three hundred years. We’ve been together a fraction of that. A tiny fraction. I mean, even if we spend my whole life together, in the long run it’ll be like a summer fling for you. I could spend a lifetime loving you and in a few years you’ll look back on it the way I look at a semester in college. Over in a flash.”

Ellie shook her head. “That’s not how vampires look at time.”

“Oh?” She rolled over and planted her head on Ellie’s shoulder. “Then enlighten me, fang girl.”

Ellie had looped her arm around Lindsey’s waist and drew her close. “No one can remember three centuries of life. We prioritize, just like everyone else. There are entire years I can’t recall a single moment of. I remember important events with crystal clarity, however. The day I was sired. The night I decided to stop drinking human blood. Centuries apart, yet they hold the same weight in my memory. When I am a thousand years old, there will come a day when I will stop and smile when I think of the day you came in from a jog and took a big drink of blood thinking it was tomato juice.”

“Ugh,” Lindsey said, shuddering. “Bad memory.”

“For you, maybe. I found it rather amusing.” She kissed Lindsey’s temple. “I remember the important things, Lindsey Wyatt. And meeting you has been one of the most important things of the past four hundred years.”

“You’re only three hundred and something.”

“I’m rounding up.”

Lindsey had chuckled and kissed Ellie again.

Now, alone in their cold and dark apartment, she sat on the floor between the couch and kitchen and cried as she attempted to figure out what had gone wrong and how she could possibly fix it.

#

Ellender fully submerged her head in the water, hands braced on either side of the bucket. The surface splashed and slapped against the sides, slowly growing still as she remained underwater. No bubbles rose to indicate she was breathing. Finally she pulled back, moving slowly so that water streamed over the curves of her face and plummeted in a pink-tinged deluge. She spit out the mouthful she had taken while she was under, scrubbed a hand over her face to further smear the remaining blood, then turned and looked back into the room.

Ilze looked at the hand she was holding, a male hand severed just above the wrist, and idly tossed it into the fire. When she turned around she revealed a curtain of blood covering her throat and the front of her dress. Her eyes were still black and her teeth were extended as she crossed the room. She looked at the headless body lying by the back door and then examined Ellender.

“Where is the head?”

“Gone,” Ellender said. “Crushed.” She wiped the back of her hand across her lips. The bodies belonged to men who had picked them up on the road where they had been walking. The men offered a ride back home, since it wasn’t safe for two pretty ladies to be out all by their lonesome in the middle of the night. The driver offered them a ride in “a real automobile,” and Ellender lied and said they had never ridden in one before. They piled into the car and were taken back to a house, presumably the home of one man or the other. Liquor was poured in flagrant disregard for Prohibition, and the ladies drank enough until the men were reasonably sure they were intoxicated.

Ellie remembered slurring her words as one man put his hand up her skirt. “Stop that. I’m a good girl, you know.”

“Relax, kitten,” he said, “you won’t remember in the morning anyway, so where’s the harm?”

She pushed his hand away twice. When he put it back the third time, his other hand closed aggressively around her hair to pull her hair back. She yelped in surprise as he wrestled her down onto the couch, and she decided that was enough justification. She pulled her lips back to expose her teeth and took her first real drink of the evening.

Ellender didn’t remember the rest, but the room told a fairly clear story. She had come back to her senses on all fours, arms and legs spread like a spider, her face dripping with blood that was still warm. Her victim’s heart was still pumping, and it was all she could do not to pounce on his remains and drink every last drop. Ilze smiled at the devastation.

“Looks like someone was a bit puckish.”

Ellender started to stand up but wobbled slightly, touching her hand to her stomach. “We have to... dispose...”

“When we’re ready to leave we’ll push some logs out of the fire. We’ll light the bodies individually to be certain they’ve burnt.”

“I can’t do this, Ilze...”

“It was your idea to only drink from bad people,” Ilze said with a weary tone. “The entire charade is your choice. I maintain that any man, woman, or child walking down any random street has reason to be considered food.”

“No, I can’t... I cannot kill.”

Ilze bent next to the corpse, found the man’s knife, and crossed the room in a blink. She kicked Ellender’s legs out from under her, straddled her waist, and pressed the blade against her throat.

“This is a much more merciful death than starving yourself. So shall I insert the blade? I believe I can sever your spinal cord with only a few choice cuts, but you may be alive for the first few.”

Ellender pushed Ilze off. “I will not kill for blood.”

“You don’t have the choice.”

“Of course I do!”

Ilze sighed and examined the blade before sticking it in her belt. “Fine. You won’t feed any longer. It is your decision.”

Ellender nodded. “Thank you, Ilze. Do you see the fireplace poker?”

They burned the house and their would-be attackers, then fled to their home. They burrowed into their small chambers underneath the main house for a long sleep through the sunlight. When Ellender woke, she discovered she had been removed from the comfort of her bed and taken to the sitting room. She had been chained to the furnace and given a wide enough movement radius to get to a bare mattress and a pitcher of water. She struggled against the restraints, but they were welded in such a way that she couldn’t find a seam. The links of the chain were too dense for her to break even with the feast she’d had the night before.

She was still struggling with it when Ilze entered. “What is the meaning of this?”

“I am merely helping you fight your addiction, Ellender. You wish to stop drinking blood, I have made that possible. The first few nights will be the worst, I’m told.” She bent down and kissed Ellender softly. “Have a good night. I’ll be back late.”

For nine days, Ellender remained bound. She worked at the chains, she worked at the furnace, she even tried breaking through the wood around the furnace in an attempt to separate it from the house, but her strength was fading with each passing day. 

On the tenth night, Ilze prepared a raw steak. The smell of blood was enough to make Ellender’s stomach twist and growl, gnawing at her from within as Ilze calmly began to eat.

“Please.” Her words were slurred by the amount of saliva flooding her mouth. “Please, Ilze...”

“Please? You are weaning yourself off human blood. Even the blood of an animal could cause a relapse... I can’t risk destroying all the hard work you’ve done.” She took a bite and swallowed, and Ellender swore she could taste it. She wet her lips, eyes wide and hungry. “Have you looked in a mirror lately, darling?”

Ellender didn’t need a mirror to know she was changing. Her hair was thinning, her eyes wide, black, circular... like a deer. Her mouth no longer closed all the way, her slender fangs giving way to a mouthful of needle-sharp teeth. She was wearing the same clothes she’d been imprisoned in, only now they were stained with flop sweat. She knew she looked like a monster but she didn’t care. She was so hungry. All she cared about was feeding.

“Very well. I suppose I could give you a little something...”

Ellender trembled with anticipation as Ilze wiped her fingers with painstaking care, then stood and crossed the room. She found her keys and knelt next to Ellender to undo the chains. Ellender heard a low keening noise and knew it was coming from her. There were only a few bites left of the steak, but she could smell the blood that had pooled on the plate.

“Please, please, please,” She groaned.

The last chain fell and Ellender stood. Before she could move, however, Ilze said, “You may come in now.”

The little girl stepped around the doorway. Ellender stared at her, nostrils flaring. A voice in her head screamed at her to stop, but she had forgotten all about the pitiful leftover on the table. The girl was so fresh and so full... 

What happened next was a memory she would carry with her to the grave, whenever she was lucky enough to occupy that desecrated ground. She sat in the corner of the kitchen, covered in her victim’s blood, tears cutting streaks through the gore as she hugged her knees to her chest. Ilze finished disposing of the remains, and Ellender looked up at her through moist eyes.

“I will never forgive you for this.”

“Me? I did nothing but speed up your timeline. You swore off blood. This would have happened sooner or later. It is only thanks to me that it happened in the privacy of our home rather than on the street somewhere. You should be thanking me.”

Ellender stood up and crossed the room. She picked up the steak knife from the table, examined the serrated edge, and then slammed it down on Ilze’s hand hard enough it was pinned to the wood. Ilze only sucked in a breath as she looked at the wooden hilt rising from between her first two knuckles.

“Never.”

She walked out on legs still shaky from her interment, eager to get out of her soiled and disgusting clothes and put the incident behind her.


	4. Chapter 4

Deb tapped Lindsey on the shoulder so as not to startle her when she sat down. Lindsey finished what she was typing, paused her music, and curled her finger around the cord to pull her earbud out. “Hey. I’m just about finished with this if you’re trying to pawn off one of your assignments.”

“I would never do such a thing. Well. Not twice in one shift.” She grinned. “Jess actually wanted me to ask if you were free tomorrow before work. We were going to get together, have... a nice... dinner.” Her voice trailed off as Lindsey was already shaking her head. “Come on, hon. You’ve been holed up in that apartment for a month.”

“She said she’d be back for her stuff.”

“Yeah. And I think we’ve discovered what a lying cunt she is.”

“Deb!”

“Well, I’m sorry. I’m pissed at her. Out of the blue she decides to end things? No. I’m not being nice, and I’m not hedging my bets just in case she comes back and you two get back together. If that happens, I’ll make my apologies then. Until that magic moment, she’s a cunt who hurt my friend.”

Lindsey said, “I hate that word. Please stop using it to describe my girlfriend.”

Deb scooted her chair closer. “Your ex-girlfriend.”

Lindsey stared at her computer screen.

“Babe, I know it hurts. I can’t imagine having a relationship blow up in my face that way.” She rubbed Lindsey’s arm. “You’re a wreck, sweetie. You’re not eating right, you’re not sleeping.” She started to say something else, but stopped herself.

“What?”

“No, it’s...”

“Say it.”

Deb sighed. “Your work is suffering.”

Lindsey leaned back in her chair and tossed her glasses onto the keyboard. “Great.”

“Hon, you’re grieving. I happen to believe that the recovery time is proportional to the length of the relationship. Seven years, you get seven weeks--”

“Seven _weeks_?”

“You don’t have to be fixed at the end of it, geez. You just have to start taking the necessary steps, okay? Step one, stop hurting yourself. Get a good night sleep even if you have to pill up to make it happen. Get out of the apartment. Go fuck someone else.”

Lindsey shook her head. “No. Uh-uh.”

“It’s not love, okay. It’s just a hook-up in a bar. It’s a way to remind your body that you’re still alive, you still have needs, and those needs can be met by a hot woman wearing leather pants and a tank top.” She rubbed Lindsey’s arm. “You need to start pulling yourself back up, or you’ll never get up again. I’ve seen it happen, babe. You’re stronger than that.”

Lindsey blinked back her tears, determined not to cry at work. At least not outside the confines of the bathroom stall. “I wish I agreed with you.”

Deb stood up and bent down to hug her. “You don’t have to come out with us, and you don’t have to fuck a stranger. But we want you to come over. Just the three of us, a quiet dinner, and then if we have to tuck you in on the couch to make sure you get some sleep, that’s what we’ll do.” She kissed Lindsey’s forehead. “Looking out for you, babe.”

“Thank you, Deb.”

Debra left her desk, and Lindsey watched her walk back through the office. She looked at her computer screen. It was only after the screen went dark that she realized she had been idly scratching her neck, circling the spot where Ellie usually fed. She dropped her hand, pinning it to the desk with the other hand, and closed her eyes.

Seven weeks before she had to take the first step. She supposed that was reasonable enough. Ellie hadn’t been back to the apartment to pick up her things in that time, so it was unlikely she was planning to return any time soon. If ever. The thought made her chest tighten, but not as much as it once had. She could feel tears building in her eyes, but she knew she could fight them. She wasn’t over Ellie, and she knew she wouldn’t be over her even if she had seven _months_ to grieve, but at least she could believe there was life after losing Ellender. 

Now all she had to do was decide if that was a life worth living.

#

Her phone rang just before noon the next day. She was sleeping on the couch these days, when she slept at all, and she had just drifted off when the ringing woke her. She squinted at the screen, the unrecognized number showing up as a mysterious blank image, and finally she decided to answer it. “Lindsey Wyatt’s phone.” Silence. “Hello? Is anyone there?” She was about to hang up when she suddenly got a very strong feeling. She listened for another few seconds and then whispered, “Ellie?”

The call was instantly disconnected. She pulled the phone away from her ear and looked at the number. 504, New Orleans. She thought about calling the number back, then debated deleting it and forgetting it had ever happened. Finally she put the phone away, tugged her sleep mask back over her eyes, and rolled over to face the back of the couch.

#

After the Great Depression she was Alan la Gard here, a slender and quiet man who worked evenings at the butcher shop. Part of her job was to dispose of the blood from the day’s slaughter. She drank as much as she needed, and she managed to get by on what she could sneak out. She wore her hair extremely short, disguised the shape of her eyes with fogged glasses, and wore shirts buttoned all the way to the collar to hide the smoothness of her throat. She wore bowties and vests, carefully establishing herself as a studious person who didn’t have time to waste on frivolities like dating or socializing at the club. Her time was divided between work and reading as many library books as she could check out. She was trying to make up for her lack of education. When she was born a certain amount of ignorance was almost expected. But now she was in America, and she needed to know how the world worked.

Alan lived in a one-room apartment over the general’s store. The owner’s wife had a crush on her and often invited her down for drinks when her husband wasn’t around. Alan always refused, but she feared there would come a time when she was forced to either reveal her true gender or find a new place to live. It would quite possibly both. Times were hard, and trying to find a new place to live as well as new jobs, not to mention a job that would give her access to the blood she needed would be near impossible.

She was tired and hungry, still suffering from her decision to forego human blood altogether, else she would have been aware of Ilze’s presence before she entered her apartment. The door was closed and she had tossed her coat over the back of her armchair before she registered that she wasn’t alone. She tensed and turned toward the dark shape standing by the window. Ilze had cut and changed her hair, now brunette with a bob. She smiled and pushed away from the wall as if she was escaping from the shadows.

“Get out of here,” Alan said.

“Oh, but I’m just starting to appreciate your disguise. It’s absolutely divine. Do you have all the accessories?” She extended her middle finger and waved it in front of her crotch.

Alan sneered. “I’m sick of playing these games with you...”

“This is no game, Ellender. This is your life. This is what you became the night you allowed me to feed from you. This is your birthright.” She crossed the room in the blink of an eye. Alan turned to run, but Ilze grabbed her and forced her to the ground. Ilze stretched out on top of her and pressed her lips against the shell of Alan’s ear. “How long has it been since you tasted the warm flood of life into your mouth? Since you drowned yourself in the essence of a living person and felt their soul slipping away?”

Alan was far weaker than Ilze due to her diet, but still she struggled to get herself free. Ilze slammed her down onto the hardwood floor and bit her ear.

“Can you smell him?”

Alan tensed. “No. Please, tell me you didn’t...”

Ilze laughed and pushed herself up. “See for yourself.”

Alan pushed up onto her hands and knees, crawling most of the way down the hall. Now that she knew what was waiting for her at the other end, the smell was overpoweringly strong. When she reached the bedroom door she gripped the frame and hauled herself up. She opened the door and stepped inside, choking out a sob when she saw what was on her bed.

She recognized him from the butcher shop. He was a regular customer, but not one she knew by name. He had been stripped down to his underwear, his arms and legs tied to the bedpost, and mouth-shaped bites had been taken all up and down his torso. They covered his arms and legs, and small trickles of blood ran down his pale skin.

Ilze’s dark presence crowded her from behind, cutting off her retreat. “I left you some...”

“Please, no...”

“You deserve this.” Ilze grabbed a handful of Alan’s gelled hair and pushed her into the bedroom. She was thrown onto the bed, falling across their victim’s legs, and she looked up into his face. He was barely conscious, hardly aware, and he reeked of blood. She looked down at herself and saw some of the blood had smeared on her hand and clothes when she fell. She made a sound of distress and tried wiping it off on the sheets.

“Don’t fight your nature, Ellender...”

“My name is Alan!”

“Drink!”

“I will not!”

Ilze grabbed Alan by the hair, lifted her off the bed, and tossed her roughly onto the floor. She stood over her former protégé and pulled up the hem of her skirt. Alan cowered, unsure of what was about to happen, but she didn’t expect the reveal of a falchion strapped to her thigh and hanging so that it would follow the motion of her leg when she stepped. She unsheathed the blade and held it so that the metal caught the light. 

“Very well. I shall make it merciful.”

“No!” Alan cringed, one hand covering her throat while she held out the other as if to hold off the attack. “Please, don’t!”

“Then make your choice, child! Life, or a quick death. There is no reason in living if you waste your opportunities on stale animal blood. You are either a vampire or a shuffling corpse. Choose! Drink from his veins or I shall open yours.”

Alan sobbed and looked at the man on the bed. The odds were good that he wouldn’t survive until morning regardless of what she did. She got onto her knees again and walked on them to the bed. She climbed onto the mattress with him and his cloudy eyes followed her progress. 

“I am very sorry, sir. You have no idea how sorry I am.”

She found a place unmarred by Ilze’s bites and lowered her lips to the clammy skin. She extended her fangs and closed her eyes as she sank them deep. Her reluctance faded after the first beat of his heart filled her mouth. She swallowed and hunched her back, taking more, drinking until she felt him weakly writhing underneath her. She flattened her hand in the middle of his chest and pushed him down so hard that the bed protested. She only stopped when there was too little blood to draw out, sitting up to watch it helplessly bead around the wounds. 

“Well done, darling,” Ilze cooed, stroking Alan’s hair.

Alan turned, slammed into Ilze with newfound strength, and wrestled her to the floor. Ilze was too startled to fight back, and she bared her teeth when Alan wrenched the sword away from her and laid its sharp edge along her throat.

“You would die along with me,” Ilze said. “I am your sire. My line dies when I do. We just established you aren’t suicidal. So why don’t you remove the sword and end this tantrum before either of us is embarrassed any further.”

Alan sobbed as she lifted the sword and threw it across the room. The blade impaled itself in the wood of the wall, and Ilze sat up. She carefully lowered Alan to the floor, undressed her, and began making love to her. Alan was too distraught to stop her, staring at the ceiling joists until Ilze was finished. Afterward Ilze sat up and wiped her mouth.

“Well, you certainly fuck like a man...”

Alan sat up. “I can’t keep doing this. Running from you, having you catch up to me...” She shrugged back into her shirt. “I need you to let me go, Ilze.”

“I made you, Ellender. You died, and it was my blood that brought you back to life. You are my creation, and we are bonded. That bond cannot be easily broken. And if I didn’t find you, you would be left behind and lost, desperate for comfort you couldn’t get. I seek you out for your own good. Look at yourself now! Stronger, more awake, vibrant.” She brushed a strand of hair out of Alan’s face. “You were a walking corpse, but now you are again a vampire.”

“I don’t want to be a vampire any longer.”

“Then retrieve my sword and I shall end it.”

Alan threw her head back and howled in anger and frustration, balling her hands into fists to pound on her thighs. “I want my life! I want to exist without you hiding in the shadows to draw me back into this hell. I want to make my own decisions. I want to live. For once in three hundred years, I want to know what it’s like to live.”

“Very well. You want to see what your life will be like without my guiding hand? I’ll give you that time.” She stood up. “Perhaps fifty years.”

The thought of a half-century without looking over her shoulder seemed like an impossible dream, but she pushed her luck. “One hundred.”

Ilze pursed her lips. “Eighty.”

Alan knew there wouldn’t be a higher offer, so she nodded. “Yes.”

“Very well. Eight decades, one lifetime. But when your sabbatical is over, you will return to me without question. You will resume your rightful place at my side, or you will suffer the consequences.”

“What consequences?”

Ilze gestured at the bed. “You insist on establishing relationships with your food. When I return in eighty years, I’m certain you will have some bleeder that you’ve become fond of. If you refuse to come home with me, I will find them and I will force you to drink from them until they are dry and empty. Do we have an accord?”

Alan stood and held out her hand. “Eighty years, and I will return to you.”

“A handshake,” Ilze said distastefully. “You have been corrupted.” She unbuttoned the collar of her dress and pushed it aside. “You know how we seal treaties.”

Alan’s stomach turned, but she stepped forward and put her arms around Ilze’s waist before bowing her head. She bit down as Ilze sank her teeth into her shoulder, and they drank from each other as a symbol of their agreement.

#

Her name was Liz, and she was a perfectly lovely woman. Funny, clever, and a great dancer. Lindsey tried desperately to connect with her, going so far as to agree with every suggestion that kept them out later and later. It was her day off, but she stayed on the same sleep schedule, so dancing at two in the morning wasn’t as daunting as it would have been to anyone else. Still she was having a hard time keeping her focus. Eight years ago she would have prayed for someone like Liz to show even the slightest interest in her. Now the beautiful receptionist was just a runner-up consolation prize.

They danced, they made out just a little, and Lindsey almost hoped the beer would give her enough of a buzz to take Liz to bed. She needed to be comforted and taken care of, even if she would regret it in the morning. 

She went to the bar for another refill, scanning the room as she waited to catch the bartender’s attention. A woman dressed all in black lingering near the shadows caught Lindsey’s attention, and she found herself staring even after the bartender asked if there was anything she needed. She waved him off without breaking eye contact, sure that the specter would vanish if she looked away. The woman was pale, although that could have been makeup, and her lips were bright red. Lindsey crossed the room, shouldering people out of the way so she could cut a straight line to the Goth, closing her fingers around her thumb and squeezing.

The dark woman turned toward her, locking eye contact as Lindsey closed the last few feet. A slight smile played on her lips as she turned to face Lindsey fully.

“Well, hello there, pet...”

“Are you a vampire?”

The woman’s expression froze. “Vampires aren’t real.”

Lindsey moved closer. “We don’t have to play around. You don’t have to lull me into a false sense of security and then hope I don’t remember. If you’re a vampire and you want to feed, the bathroom is right there.”

The woman stared, then pushed away from the wall. “What’s your name?”

“Do you care?”

They went into the bathroom together and found an empty stall. Lindsey put her hands under the woman’s jacket and stretched her neck out, holding her breath as the sharp teeth found her vein and punctured. Her finger curled in the small of the vampire’s back, and she rocked her hips forward with a quiet sigh of relief. The woman pushed her against the side of the stall, one leg between Lindsey’s thighs, and her tongue swept across the puncture wounds to draw out more blood. Lindsey rode the stranger’s thigh, thrusting as pleasure washed through her.

She pushed the vampire away as she came, slumping against the metal wall and trembling as her partner wiped the excess blood away from her mouth. They stood on their separate sides of the stall, catching their breath.

“I’m Kate,” the vampire said.

Lindsey said, “Did any blood get on my collar?”

“No. Are you here a lot?”

“Thanks,” Lindsey said. She unlocked the stall and stepped out into the group of women who had been waiting outside. A few of them made sleazy comments that she ignored, pushing past them and returning to the club. She found Liz at their table.

“Hey, you were gone for a while...”

“I fucked someone in the bathroom. I’m sorry. I don’t think this is going to work out.” She put down some money on the table. “For the drinks. I’m... I’m really sorry.”

She fled before Liz could process what she’d said. By the time she got home, there were already three angry messages on her phone from Liz. “What the hell is wrong with you? Liz is a great girl, and she really liked you. When are you going to get over that bitch and move on with your life? It’s pathetic, Lindsey. She dumped you, okay? Move on...”

Lindsey forced herself to listen to all of the messages, sitting on the couch and stroking the sensitive skin where Kate had fed. She’d forgotten how it felt to tease the scar tissue, rubbing her fingertips over it the next day and feeling the thrill as she remembered how it had gotten there. Vampires had a way of activating platelets, promoting rapid healing in their victims. But every so often a mark would linger, a pale pink hickey that hung just below her ear like binary stars. 

When she was done flagellating herself with the messages, she went back through her call log. Eight messages from New Orleans since Ellie walked out of her life. Never from the same number, and the two times she had tried calling back there wasn’t an answer. Never a message, never speaking, but she had no doubt who it was. And if Ellie was still taking the time to call just to hear her outgoing message, there had to be hope. There had to be some outside circumstance to justify her leaving.

She changed out of her club clothes, showered to get the vampire’s perfume out of her hair, and crawled under the blankets of the bed she was just starting to reclaim for herself. She still stayed on her side, still pulled down the pillow she thought of as Ellie’s so she could hold it while she slept. The thought of sharing her blood with a stranger felt more like a violation than the orgasm, more than kissing Liz, and she felt too ashamed to have the pillow in bed with her. She put it on the floor, turned off the light, and stared at the wall for a good hour before she finally passed out.

She dreamed of the night she’d woken to find Ellie pressing insistently against her from behind. She had her lips on Lindsey’s neck but she hadn’t broken the skin. In reality Lindsey had just smiled and let Ellie suckle on her until she drifted back to sleep. In the dream she reached up and used fingernails much sharper than she’d ever had and cut the skin open. Ellie had whimpered eagerly as she began to feed, lapping at the skin and slurping up every drop. Lindsey writhed in pleasure as Ellie drank it all down, realizing too late that she wasn’t stopping. Dread filled her. Ellie was asleep, out of control, drinking more than she needed.

“Stop... Ellender, please, stop, don’t...”

But Ellie was too far gone. She bared her teeth and tore at Lindsey’s neck. Blood flooded out onto the bed, and Lindsey screamed as Ellie turned into a beast and tore her apart.

Lindsey threw her pillow as she woke, flinging her arm uselessly at the phantoms of the dream. She was drenched in sweat and, to her shame, her thighs were wet. She kicked the blankets off the bed and stood up. Outside it was morning, her internal clock telling her it was bedtime. She couldn’t imagine sleeping, couldn’t risk another mixed-signal dream like the one she’d just suffered. Instead she wiped herself down with the towel from her shower, dressed, and called work to let them know she would need a few days off.

Their goodbye couldn’t be a quick fight and then a vanishing. The legacy of the past seven years couldn’t be the most insane conversation she’d ever had. There was no closure, no ending she could make sense of. That was why she felt like she was cheating with Liz and the vampire in the bathroom. That was why she still expected Ellie to come home from work at any second. Their relationship was on hold and if she wanted to make any progress she had to put a stake in its heart. She had to have a real ending and escape purgatory.

She had to go to New Orleans.


	5. Chapter 5

On rare occasions, Lindsey’s schedule meshed so well with Ellie’s that they arrived home at the same time. Lindsey walked into the lobby of their building to find Ellie at the mailboxes, and she broke into a spontaneous smile as she bypassed the stairs to greet her. She wrapped her arms around Ellie’s midsection and kissed her neck.

“Morning, beautiful. Have a good day at work?”

“Pretty good.” She patted Lindsey’s hand before squirming out of her grip. She was polite about her escape, and Lindsey threaded her arm around Ellie’s to take her hand as they walked to the stairs. “How about you? Plenty of news in the world?”

“I managed to find some.”

Ellie led her upstairs and into their apartment, where they deposited their things on the dining room table. Lindsey said, “Were you going to grab a shower?”

“Do I need one?”

“No, I was just going to take a quick bath. But if you need...”

Ellie waved her off. “Go ahead. I just need to get into some non-uniform clothes.”

“Okay. I’ll see you in a bit.” She leaned in for a kiss, but just before she made contact Ellie turned her head so she caught cheek instead of lips. “Whoa. That was a little cold.”

“Hm? Oh, sorry. I’m... I’m just distracted.”

Lindsey shook her head. “No, that was intentional. What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong.”

Lindsey examined Ellie for a moment and realized the issue. “You fed from someone else.”

“I...”

“It’s only a problem if you lie about it.”

Ellie closed her mouth and looked at Lindsey for a moment. Finally, she nodded. “I was tired and stressed at work...”

“Baby, I knew you hadn’t been sleeping well.”

“I know.” She took Lindsey’s hand, rubbing the knuckle with her thumb. “I couldn’t concentrate. I didn’t want to bug you, so I called someone...”

“A prostitute.”

“No.” Ellie winced. “It was a man. I wanted to ensure that there was as little crossover between what you and I have as possible. It was just feeding.”

Lindsey pulled Ellie close. “If you took everything you needed from me, I’d be dead in a month. I know you try to make up for it with animal blood, but I also know that’s not enough.” She touched Ellie’s chin and forced her to look up. “I’m glad you got what you needed. And I’m glad you got it without giving me a headache or making me take a long, long nap.” She stroked her girlfriend’s cheek. “Just be honest with me in the future, honey. I’m the reason you fell off the wagon in the first place, so I can’t be too upset if you have to... run out to the bar and get a quick drink.” 

“That’s not a very apt analogy,” Ellie said softly.

“No, it’s not. Because beer is unnatural, but blood is something you require. You can’t go cold turkey, you just can’t. But you can be smart about it. That’s what you did. Until you came home and got all furtive and quiet.” She kissed the corners of Ellie’s lips. “Rinse your mouth out with a beer. Then get a bottle for me and join me in the bathtub. I’ll give you a shoulder massage.”

Ellie put her arms around Lindsey’s waist. “Perhaps I’ll give you a shoulder massage, for being so understanding.”

Lindsey grinned. “Maybe we can work out a compromise.” She kissed Ellie’s chin. “Thank you for not letting me kiss you with someone else’s taste in your mouth. I appreciate that.”

“Of course. From now on, I’ll be open and honest when I have to feed from someone else.”

“That’s all I ask.” She slid away. “I’ll fill the bath, you get your mouth ready for some heavy-duty kissin’ and stuff.”

Ellie saluted. “Will do.”

Lindsey went into the bathroom and sat on the edge of the tub to start the water. Once it was running, she allowed herself a quick and stifled sob. She had felt it creeping when Ellie confessed, and she was proud of herself for holding it back until the door was partially shut. She knew that what Ellie had done was nothing compared to what they did, knew there was no sexual component with whatever man had been the recipient of her fangs, but that didn’t change the fact that she had done it. She had put her mouth on someone else’s body and they had given her what she needed. Lindsey was hurt by that, and she was sad she couldn’t provide everything Ellie needed.

She cupped her hand under the water and splashed her face with it so Ellie wouldn’t see her tears, then stood up and undressed. By the time Ellie joined her in the bathroom she was submerged with her arms resting on the edge of the bath. Ellie took off the remainder of her uniform and slipped into the tub behind her, legs stretching out on either side of Lindsey’s body. Lindsey stroked Ellie’s legs and leaned back against her.

“Will you always come home to me? No matter what?”

“No matter what,” Ellie whispered into Lindsey’s hair. “I swear.”

Lindsey smiled. “Then that’s all that matters.”

“Are you sure you’re not mad?”

“I’m more upset you forgot to bring me a beer.”

“Oh, damn it...”

Lindsey laughed and rolled over, sending the water splashing against the sides of the tub. “That’s okay. I’ll just have to find something else to do with my mouth...”

#

New Orleans was bigger than Lindsey expected. Part of her was convinced it was just Bourbon Street, with a cluster of apartment buildings and houses around it. She didn’t fully consider how she was going to find Ellie in a city she’d never been to until she actually arrived and realized she had her work cut out for her. She had managed to get six days off from work, and that included her normal weekend, so eight days before she had to be home. When she was packing that seemed like plenty of time but now she wasn’t so sure she would be able to do it with eight weeks to search.

She checked into her hotel and checked the time on her phone. Between jet lag, not sleeping, and being off, she had no real clue what time it was or if she should be tired. It was nearly sunrise, so she should have been tired. But the chance to see Ellie again had her full of adrenaline. She left her hotel and started walking, unsure of where she was going or what kind of search she planned to do. She needed to get a feel for the town before she could narrow it down to any one corner.

On her third day in the Big Easy, she found herself debating how it had gotten that name. There was nothing easy about it. She slept horribly and spent her evenings making the rounds of nightclubs trying to find the city’s vampire population. She found a few people who were possibilities, but they all claimed ignorance when she approached them and asked about Ellie. Everyone pled ignorance, even the vampire fetishists in the French Quarter.

She returned to her apartment after her fourth failed expedition and lay down on the bed. She thought back to everything she knew about Ellie, the stories she had told about her past, everything that could point her in the right direction. She didn’t know anything about New Orleans, and Ellie was a homebody. She rarely liked to go out, and when she did she would let Lindsey choose what they did. 

Lindsey sat up with sudden insight. She checked her watch, put her shoes back on, and hurried out. It was almost dawn, with the sun just starting to color the sky over the Gulf, and she knew she only had a small window in which to check her new theory. She took a streetcar down to the water and headed for the docks. As she scanned the crowds, she remembered a conversation they’d once had while walking on the Elliott Bay Trail.

“That looks like fun.”

Ellie, with her large sunglasses and wide-brimmed hat, followed the direction Lindsey was looking. “A cruise? I doubt I’d be much fun, unless you had someone else in mind as a traveling companion.”

Lindsey smiled. “Not the ship. That.” She pointed at the dock. “See those people? Family members and loved ones all waiting to welcome someone home. It’s like watching airplanes arrive, but the security isn’t as much of a headache. Just reunions... I love reunions.”

They had never made it to watch the cruise ships. It always seemed like a “later” thing, some activity they would always have time for. New Orleans had a cruise ship terminal, and some vestige of hope at the back of her mind thought maybe, possibly there was a chance that Ellie had some sentimental connection to the idea. It was ridiculous, idiotic, to think that the woman who had walked out on her and thrown away their relationship would have any nostalgic...

She stopped jogging and stared at the security guard sitting on a bench facing the water. Her hair was much shorter, tied into a little brush of a ponytail, but it was undeniably her. She had a bag of take-out next to her on the bench and she was finishing up what looked to be an extremely-rare hamburger. She wiped her lips and gathered her trash, folded the top of the bag, and slipped off the edge of the bench. Lindsey backed up, desperate for a place to hide, but Ellie walked the other direction and never looked back. As she walked away Lindsey stepped out into the open and watched her.

“You know her?”

Lindsey turned to see a woman wearing a green apron had approached. “Sorry?”

“The guard? I noticed you staring at her like you’d seen a ghost.” She smiled. “I work right over there, and she’s here pretty much every morning. She never talks to anyone, never meets anyone. She just watches the ships and the people. We all have theories. My favorite is that she’s waiting for someone to show up on one of the ships, but they never do.”

Lindsey blinked back her tears. “Maybe she flew instead...”

The woman looked at her. “Maybe so.”

“Thanks,” Lindsey said, hurrying off in pursuit. She didn’t know if she wanted to catch up or not, but she didn’t want to lose Ellie so soon after finding her. She followed her to a converted loft that had become four apartments, and Ellie took the exterior stairs up to the apartment at the back. She watched her go in, the lights going on, and stopped across the street as if she had hit a brick wall. She had flown across the country, from one coastline to another, and she had searched the entire city for this moment. Now it was here and she couldn’t even cross the street?

She walked to the foot of the stairs, then finally forced herself to ascend. She looked at the doorbell and had the sudden inane thought that people pressed that when Ellie would order pizza or Chinese for delivery. Well, her food had arrived, and she was the delivery woman. She pressed the doorbell and stepped to the side so she wouldn’t be visible through the peephole. After a few seconds the chain was retracted and the door opened. Ellie looked out, flinched, and rocked back on her heel as if she was planning to shut the door.

“You shouldn’t... Lindsey, God, what...”

“Hi, Ellender.”

“Hi.”

They stood silently until Lindsey said, “Can I come in?”

“I don’t think that’s a good idea.” 

They held their awkward faceoff for another moment, then Ellie grabbed the front of Lindsey’s blouse and pulled her in. She slammed the door, pressed Lindsey against it, and kissed her. Lindsey forgot her anger and hurt and put her arms around Ellie as naturally as she parted her lips for her lover’s tongue. Ellie moaned and bit Lindsey’s bottom lip before moving south, kissing her jaw, extending her tongue to lick the spot she where she usually bit. The light touch and warm breath made Lindsey wet, and she grabbed hold of Ellie’s hair to pull it free from its braid.

“I’m so fucking angry with you,” Lindsey moaned.

“I know...”

“Bite me, goddamn it...”

Ellie complied, and Lindsey cried out as she bled. She hooked her leg on Ellie’s hip and pressed against her, Ellie’s hand moving to her ass and pulling her even closer. They stumbled away from the door and fell, Ellie taking the brunt of the hit when they landed on the floor. With Lindsey on top her blood flowed freely into Ellie’s mouth, and she growled as she drank it down, her hands roaming over Lindsey’s body. Their clothes came undone almost by accident, buttons undone and shoulders lifted to shrug out of shirts. 

Lindsey braced her hands on the floor and slid between Ellie’s legs. Sitting up, blood smeared on her neck and shoulder, she looked down into Ellie’s glazed eyes as she began to thrust. Ellie guided her hips, then arched her back as she came. Lindsey closed her eyes, knowing that she was probably making a mistake, but she was with Ellie and that was the only thing that mattered at the moment. She bent down and kissed Ellie’s bloody lips, furrowing her brow as their tongues twisted together, and Ellie put a hand between her legs to help her finish. Seconds later Lindsey trembled, bit down on Ellie’s lip hard enough to make it bleed before she rolled to one side.

“I hate you.”

“You have every right to.” Ellie wiped her lip and then suck the blood from the meaty part of her hand. “I’m sorry.”

“Save your sorry.” She sat up and drew her knees to her chest, hugging them tightly as she looked at the mess of their discarded clothes. “You wanted to leave, fine. I could have understood that. I’m a big girl. But to do it that way... that was so shitty, Ellender. That was the worst thing anyone has ever done to me, and it came from you, and that just made it hurt so much more.”

“I know.”

“You have no right to say you missed me. You’re the one who walked out. You did that to yourself.”

“I know.”

Lindsey looked at her. “I want closure. I want to end this properly so I can move on. I’m done pining over you, Ellie. Finish the job, okay? Kill us so I can leave you behind.”

Ellie sat up and leaned against her. Lindsey shied away from her, but Ellie put her arms around her and held tight. Lindsey closed her eyes and grimaced as Ellie kissed her cheeks and eyelids.

“Selfish bitch,” Lindsey whispered.

“I know.” She moved her lips to Lindsey’s ear. “I didn’t want to. You have to believe me. I said those awful things because I wanted you to hate me. I wanted to be the only one hurting, but I guess I screwed up. I’m so sorry.”

“Why? Just tell me why.”

Ellie moved her mouth to Lindsey’s ear. “Her name is Ilze...”

She explained as the sweat dried on their skin, stroking her thumb over the newly-healed wound on Lindsey’s neck. Lindsey went from angry to confused, quickly working back up to anger at a fresh target. Her arms slowly looped around Ellie’s body, pulling her tighter as she came to understand the reasoning behind why her heart had been broken.

“If I had stayed, she’d have found you. She would have hurt you, or made me hurt you, just to get at me. I thought this way would be easier. I’ve hated myself ever since I left you. I wish you had just punched me in the face when I opened the door and walked away.” She nipped at Lindsey’s ear. “I’m glad you didn’t. I’ve missed your taste.”

Lindsey turned her head and found Ellie’s lips. They kissed on the floor, then eventually moved to the bed. Lindsey stretched out on the mattress, sitting up on her elbows as Ellie knelt next to the bed and bent down between her legs. Lindsey ran her hands through Ellie’s hair and chuckled. 

“I hate the new hair...”

“Sorry...”

“I’ll add it to the things you have to make up for.” She guided Ellie to her sex, closed her eyes, and leaned back. Ellie went slowly at first, teasing and drawing out the pleasure, but two months of estrangement had taken away her patience. She closed her lips around Lindsey’s clit, rubbing her middle and ring fingers against her labia before unfolding them to push inside. Lindsey tightened around her, lifting her ass up off the bed with a groan of pleasure before she sank back down.

“Let me come,” she whispered.

Ellie moaned, and Lindsey climaxed. She shuddered through the waves of her orgasm, smoothing her hands over the bed Ellie had spent the last two months sleeping in alone. Or at least, she assumed she had been alone. She put those thoughts out of her head; she had hardly been faithful herself, even though her best efforts had been anything but satisfying. She slipped her hands under Ellie’s arms and hauled her up, wrapping her legs around her waist to hook her ankles in the small of Ellie’s back as they kissed. 

“You’re crying, my love,” Ellie whispered.

“Oh.” She smiled. “Lick them up.”

Ellie did as she was told and Lindsey shuddered. She put her hands on Ellie’s back and stroked her smooth, porcelain skin. She had always loved Ellie’s body. Her youth was locked in hundreds of years earlier by the virus, and in the time since she had built up tone. She lifted Ellie’s arm and kissed the bicep, which the vampire obediently flexed for her. It bulged against Lindsey’s lips and she ran her tongue down to the elbow. 

“I love you.”

“Oh,” Ellie’s voice broke. “Oh, Lindsey Joan Wyatt, I love you stronger and more completely than I have ever loved anyone else. Thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you for finding me.”

Lindsey cupped Ellie’s face. “I could never let you go, Ellender. Even after the awful things you said to me--”

“I’m sorry,” Ellie said, almost inaudibly.

“--I couldn’t just walk away.” She kissed Ellie’s top lip, then the bottom. “What happens now? Am I in danger right now?”

“This second? Probably not. Ilze doesn’t keep tabs on me each and every day. She just likes to know where I am. She likes to keep me under her thumb.” She rolled to one side so she could run her hand down the center of Lindsey’s torso. “God, you’re even more beautiful than I remembered.”

Lindsey smiled. “Maybe I could stay. Convince her...”

Ellie was shaking her head. “I asked. Of course I asked.” She drew a circle around Lindsey’s navel. “She said if I would change you...” She took a deep breath. “I couldn’t do that to you.”

“I wouldn’t want it.” She picked up Ellie’s hand and brought it to her lips. She kissed the webbing between her thumb and forefinger and gently bit down. “So I have to find a way to steal you from her, huh?”

“That’s easier said than done, my love.”

“I tracked down the woman who dumped me and found her in a city I’d never been to before. It took me a week. You think I’m scared of her?”

Ellie smiled and brushed Lindsey’s hair out of her face. “You make a valid point. If anyone can figure out how to fix this, it will be you. I should never have doubted that. I could have saved us both two months of pain.”

“None of that matters now. All that matters is we’re together. We’ll figure it out together.”

Ellie stroked her hand back up Lindsey’s chest, gripped the back of her neck, and pulled her up for a kiss. After the past few minutes, she had to admit that anything really did seem possible.


	6. Chapter 6

While Lindsey slept, Ellie pulled her close, letting her cuddle against her side with her cheek flat against her shoulder. She played with Lindsey’s hair until it was spread across her chest and watched the flutter of her eyelids and the slight twist and popping of her lips until she finally started to wake up. She blinked a few times to focus her eyes, tilted her head up, and smiled sleepily.

“Oh. It’s you.”

“Who else would it be?” She bent down and kissed Lindsey between the eyelids.

Lindsey pushed herself up and fixed her hair. “No one. Seriously...” She put her hand on Ellie’s stomach. “There wasn’t... I mean...” She furrowed her brow. “There was some kissing. And I let a vampire feed off me.”

Ellie felt the hurt building up, but she shoved it back down. “I understand. In fact I would have been disappointed if you hadn’t tried to move on.”

“Is it weird that I needed the bite more than sex?”

“Not really. The bite can be sexual. And considering the way I hurt you, sex would probably have been a bad idea. I will never forgive myself for hurting you so badly.”

Lindsey kissed her cheek. “Well, that’s all in the past now. Right?”

“I don’t know how it can be. Ilze still had a hold on me. If I run away, she’ll find me. If she finds me, she’ll hurt you.” She took Lindsey’s hand. “I can’t risk that happening.”

“Why does she have such a hold on you, anyway?”

“She’s my sire.”

Lindsey shrugged. “Yeah, but what does that _mean_?”

Ellie considered her answer before speaking. “There’s only one way to become a vampire. You have to die. The primary method of death is blood loss. It’s how I died. Ilze drank from me until I was empty, then she fed me a few drops of her blood and buried me in a shallow grave. When I woke, I fed until I was full, then she let me drink from her again. It was her blood that gave me life, and it’s the only reason I’m still alive today.”

“You still have her blood coursing through your veins?”

“No, but the process it started is still going.”

Lindsey put her head down on Ellie’s shoulder. “I don’t know if I can walk away from you again. I’ll try, but I want you to expect a little kicking and screaming.”

“I was thinking about that.” She had carefully maneuvered herself so that she could put her hands around both of Lindsey’s wrists. Once she had, she held them loosely in her grip. “There are two ways to keep you safe from Ilze. I could turn you, making you part of her line and therefore under her purview. We’ve talked about that before.”

“Yes, we have. I haven’t changed my mind.”

“Good.” She kissed Lindsey’s temple. “The other option is... I could kill Ilze.”

Lindsey shuddered. “God, baby, that sounded so cold.”

“To keep you safe? I would do it in a heartbeat.”

“But if she’s your sire... you said that if she gets killed, you die with her.”

Ellie nodded. “That’s the way it works.”

“So...” Lindsey frowned. “Wait. Kill her to free me, but you... you’d die!” She started to fight, but Ellie tightened her grip. She pulled Lindsey’s arms until they crossed her chest, and she pinned Lindsey against her. Lindsey fought, but the vampire’s strength was too much for her. “Let me go, damn it!”

“Listen to me,” Ellie said quietly against Lindsey’s ear. “What is the point of life? To just keep going in perpetuity? We’re supposed to do things with our lives, meet people, build something we can be proud of and that makes the world a better place. I’ve lived for over three hundred years, and it was only in the last seven I can claim to be proud of anything. I loved you, Lindsey, and that is enough for me to decide it’s time for me to go.”

Lindsey bucked against her and tried to wrench her hands free, but Ellie was relentless.

“I’ve had my time. I won’t let Ilze hurt you, and I won’t destroy your life just because of what I am. God knows you’ve made sacrifices for my sake in the past. Now it’s my turn. This is your way out. And you’ve already seen what life without me can be... this reunion was just our chance to have a proper farewell. I have loved you with all of my heart, Lindsey. I have fought to survive in the past, and I have done horrific, ghastly things to keep myself breathing. You’re the only person I’m willing to lay down my life to save, and I do it only with the regret of never seeing you grow old.”

“I thought I already was old,” Lindsey said meekly.

Ellie laughed and kissed her neck. “You’re but a wee bairn in mine eyes.”

“Scottish? You choose now, before nobly sacrificing yourself to save my life, to reveal you have Scottish blood in you?”

“Aye, lass.” She licked Lindsey’s neck. “I want to taste you again...”

“Go ahead...”

“You haven’t eaten.” She released Lindsey’s hands. “Go on. I can wait until after you’re replenished. You taste better after a healthy breakfast.”

They got out of bed, and Lindsey turned to face Ellie. “Change me. If it’s eternal life with you or a few decades without you, I’ll choose the former. I can learn how to be a vampire. You can teach me. You can be my sexy mentor.”

Ellie smiled sadly. “My love. I am grateful my longevity kept me alive long enough to meet you, but that doesn’t change the fact it is a curse. It sounds trite and perhaps it is, but the fact is that I would choose to be human again without hesitation. It’s the one thing I would love to have, and I won’t take that treasure away from you. Don’t ask me again, okay?”

Lindsey nodded. “I understand.” She hugged Ellie. “I’ll always love you. My vampire.”

Ellie pressed a kiss to Lindsey’s neck, parting her lips and using her tongue without biting. She slid her hands down and patted Lindsey on the rear, then pulled away from her.

“I have some food in the cupboard. Eat up. I want my breakfast when I came back.” She nipped at her earlobe and let her go. She went into the bathroom and ran the shower, holding her hand under the spray to feel when it got warm. Now that she was alone she allowed her conflicting thoughts about Lindsey’s surprise arrival to break through. She had done her best to cut every tie, to salt the ground and burn the last bridge back home, and Lindsey had still found her. If nothing else, that deserved her dedication and loyalty. And if giving up her life after three centuries was what it took to make Lindsey safe, she was willing to pay the price.

She showered quickly, her skin already trembling at the thought of another feed. She hadn’t realized how much she missed Lindsey’s taste until their reunion the night before. Just the thought made her lick her lips, and she ducked her head under the spray. Her short hair was awful, she had to admit, and she was glad Lindsey agreed. She shampooed what was left of her hair and regretted that she wouldn’t live long enough to grow it out. Still, she had worn worse hairstyles over the years.

Ellie shut off the water and wrapped herself in her robe. “Lindsey? Did you want me to leave the shower on for you? The hot water in this building is a little tricky.” She brushed the tangles from her hair. “Linds?” She had a sudden, horrific image of Ilze standing over Lindsey’s drained corpse and left the bathroom so quickly that the doorknob left a divot in the wall. She looked into the empty kitchen, the bed with its tangled sheets, and the living room with its shuttered windows to keep out the light. The apartment was empty.

“I dreamed her,” she whispered, almost immediately realizing how ridiculous that was. She could still taste Lindsey’s blood in her mouth, and the bed... even from across the room she could smell Lindsey on the tangled sheets. She went to the front window and peered out, but the street was as empty as the apartment. Ellie turned and walked into the living room, scanning for clues until she spotted her phone on the coffee table. She had left it on the kitchen counter to charge, but now...

“Oh, no.” She picked it up and swept a trembling finger across the screen. It opened to a map that showed the Ilze’s street. “No, no, no...” 

Lindsey had to have looked at her address book, then used the map to find out where Ilze lived. It was within walking distance of the apartment.

“No!” She threw the phone at the wall hard enough that it imbedded in the drywall, and she tore off her robe as she leapt into the bedroom. She dressed faster than humanly possible, throwing on a loose top with drawstring sweatpants, and then raced from the apartment with bare feet. Lindsey couldn’t have that much of a head start, and Ellie had the advantage of knowing shortcuts. Whatever Lindsey was planning to do, Ellie could get there first and stop it.

#

The cabbie who picked her up outside of Ellie’s apartment gave her an odd smile in the rearview mirror, and it was only halfway to their destination that she realized what he was thinking. With her disheveled hair and misbuttoned blouse, he had to assume she was pulling a walk of shame. She fixed her hair and tried to look as respectable as possible, but she didn’t really care what he thought. When he parked outside of the classic old Victorian home, she handed him some cash through the slot and pulled herself from the backseat.

She had just reached for the gate when Ellie slammed into her from the right, knocking her off-balance. She nearly careened into the bushes, but she was saved by Ellie’s hand gripping her arm tight enough to leave a bruise. 

“Ow!”

“I’m sorry. I can’t let you do this.”

“You don’t know what I’m going to do.”

“I have an idea. And I know that it would be suicide.”

Lindsey said, “So it’s better to just let _you_ commit suicide?”

“Yes. I have lived ten times longer than you. I have lived longer than anyone deserves. Let my death mean something, Lindsey.”

“No. I mean... of course I want it to mean something. But not if there’s another way.”

A woman dressed all in black seemed to appear at Lindsey’s side as if she had been conjured, but in retrospect Lindsey remembered hearing the rapid footsteps of her approach. She wore a wide-brimmed hat with a veil that covered most of her face, and Lindsey shivered when the woman fixed an ice-cold gaze on her.

“Perhaps the two of you would like to continue this discussion inside.”

Ellie tensed. “Ilze... th-this is...”

“I know who this is.” She smiled sweetly. “If you thought my previous comment was a suggestion, allow me to rephrase. Inside. Now.”

Ellie put her arm around Lindsey and leaned close. “I won’t let her hurt you.”

“We’ll see about that,” Ilze said.

Ellie’s sire walked behind them up the stone path, corralling them toward the covered porch. Ellie opened the door and paused before guiding Lindsey over the threshold. Lindsey assumed she had taken the second to confirm the house was empty before bringing her inside, and she showed her appreciation by putting an arm around her waist. They passed through a narrow mud room, turning right into a dark and cozy living room. Ilze closed the door behind them and Lindsey heard the frightening sound of a lock being thrown.

“Now, then. Ellender, why don’t you make the official introductions?”

“Ilze, currently known as Lisa Jannson, this is Lindsey Wyatt. My partner. Lindsey, this is the woman who killed me.”

Ilze clucked her tongue. “Surely I’m more to you than that, but we’ll put that aside. Hello, Lindsey. It’s a pleasure to make your acquaintance.”

“Wish I could say the same. I’m here to conduct business.”

“Lindsey, just--”

Lindsey stepped away from Ellie. “No. I didn’t plan on you being here for this, but I’ll do it in front of you. Ilze, you took my property.”

Both Ilze and Ellie were surprised by that accusation. “Explain.”

“You’re Ellender’s sire. You created her by sharing your blood all those years ago. But your blood is long gone. It cycled, and it was replaced with the blood of everyone else she’s fed from since. Despite that, the time she drank your blood was the most important. Until now. Because you’re no longer the one keeping her alive. I am. For the past seven years, she has fed only from me. It’s my blood running through her veins, my blood that pumps with every beat of her heart. Sure, there have been occasional outsiders. She’s had a rare burger or gotten a pint from a butcher here and there. But not enough to make a difference. You brought her to life, but I kept her alive. Seven years’ worth of my blood... That makes your contribution moot. It means you’re nothing to her. I’m the one who gives her life now. You took her away from me, and I came here to take her back.”

“Oh, Jesus,” Ellie muttered. “Lindsey, please tell me that’s not your whole plan...”

Ilze smiled and crossed her arms. “Sweet little canteen, thinks she has rights? Oh, Ellender, where did you find one so adorable?” She laughed. “It doesn’t matter how much she drinks or how recently it was. I turned her, and therefore I will always be her sire. I will always hold sway over her. For instance, if I told her to rip open your throat so I could feed, she would do it without hesitation.”

Ellie said, “The hell I would.”

Ilze looked at her, the smile wavering slightly. “You will do as I say, as you always have in the past. As you did when I told you to leave this little canteen--”

“Lindsey Joan Wyatt is not a canteen. If you use that term for her again, I will bleed you just enough to keep you alive and then lock you in a sunroom until you sincerely apologize for what you have done. Is that clear?”

Ilze’s eyes went black. “Kill her. I’m peckish.”

“Take one step against her and I will destroy you. I intended to come here and kill you to keep her safe, and nothing has changed my resolve.”

“You will die with me.”

“I will gladly die...”

Ilze looked at Lindsey and then, to the shock of everyone, she withdrew. “The blood means nothing. You are a human, and the blood of a vampire... specifically a sire... carries with it a special weight. Three hundred years after I slit my wrist over her dead lips, it still holds a vice grip on her soul.” She looked at Ellie. “At least, it should. Do you know some of the awful, horrific things the woman at your side has done because I told her to? Have you any idea of the atrocities she is responsible for?”

“I know exactly who she is,” Lindsey said without hesitation.

Ilze said, “It seems I did not.”

Ellie narrowed her eyes. “What is going on, Ilze?”

“You both came here expecting to die. Is that a fair assessment?”

“Yes,” Ellie said.

Lindsey said, “I thought there was a chance my plan...” She caught Ellie’s glare. “Yes. I suppose I did. I would die to get her away from you.”

Ilze pursed her lips. “Ellender... I gave you eighty years.” She looked at Lindsey. “I suppose I can give you... forty more.”

Ellie’s breath caught in her chest and she instinctively reached for Lindsey’s hand. “Forty...”

“Or fifty. I suppose there’s a possibility she could live that long.” She sighed and shrugged. “What’s a single lifetime? If this person is worth you risking your life for, then trying to keep you apart would only be a constant hassle. Look at us now... only two months and she’s standing here prepared to step in front of a city bus for a hollow victory. And you, not only threatening your sire but defying me. Sometimes it is smarter to step back and refuse to fight, and that is what I am choosing here.” She moved to the side and gestured at the door. “Go back to your life, Ellender. I can be patient.”

Ellie said, “Why are you being kind? After everything you have done to me in the past...”

“Do you remember Frankfurt, Ellender? The milkmaid?”

Ellie cringed and shook her head as the memories flooded back. “ _Choose, little girl. Your mother or your father. Which shall be devoured and which will lead you to freedom. Choose now or I shall kill them both. Choose!_ ” Ellie swallowed the lump in her throat as she remembered the little girl had chosen her father... and then Ellie had given him the choice. “ _Shall I slaughter your wife, or the girl who just threw you to the wolves? The choice has become yours, Herr Echolson..._ ” In the end, she had killed the entire family.

“I was a different person then.”

“And is it impossible to believe that I have changed as well?” She looked at Lindsey and scoffed. “I have lived much longer than Ellender, little canteen, but I have never loved anyone so strongly that I would threaten my sire. And I have never known anyone who would endanger themselves as recklessly as you just did. Go. Enjoy the short time you will have together before you wither away and die. Then I will see you again, Ellender.”

“Count on that, Ilze.”

The two vampires held each other’s gaze for a moment, and Lindsey knew there was a vast amount of conversation going on beneath the surface. Finally, Ellie put an arm around Lindsey’s waist and whispered, “Come on, baby.”

Ellie kept watch as Lindsey undid the locks, and she threw cautious looks over her shoulder for the long walk back to her apartment. Once there Ellie finally let go of her arm.

“Pack. Quickly, before she decides to change her mind.”

“Is she really letting us go?”

“For now.” She pushed her hair out of her face. “Yes. She doesn’t make decisions of this magnitude and then just arbitrarily throw them away. It’s... in her mind, it’s like you waiting three months to buy that new jacket because you know it will be on sale. Waiting another forty years for you to die of natural causes is just... less hassle.”

Lindsey said, “So I can spend the rest of my life with you?”

Ellie smiled. “Yes. If you’ll have me.”

Lindsey crossed the room and grabbed Ellie, hitting her so hard that they stumbled back against the wall. Ellie laughed into the kiss, cupped Lindsey’s face, and pushed her off. 

“Easy, tiger.”

“You’re a vampire. You can take it.”

Ellie laughed and kissed Lindsey’s cheeks, her forehead, and finally her lips. “I can.” 

“And what happens... after? When Ilze comes looking for you?”

Ellie sighed. “I haven’t seen her in eighty years. The past two months, I thought she was the same person, but the woman I knew would never have let me go. Who knows who she will be in another few decades? Who knows who I will be?”

Lindsey said, “The woman I love. That’s who you’ll be.”

Ellie grinned and held her tighter. “I can live with that distinction.”

“So,” Lindsey said, “before we pack and get the hell out of here...” She craned her neck to the side. “How about one for the road?”

Ellie grinned and two of her teeth grew into fangs. “Well... maybe just one.”

Lindsey put her hand on the back of Ellie’s head and guided her down, gasping when Ellie bit down. The future was going to bring all kinds of changes, some good and some bad. She was going to get old and gray while Ellie remained the same. There would be fights. There would be other women that Ellie fed from, and Lindsey would get jealous. But she knew there would be joy and happiness and so much love that those little things didn’t matter. What mattered was that she could spend the rest of her life with the woman she loved.

In the end, who could ask for anything more than that?


End file.
